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michael foolsley's definitions

cock sadness

the end of sex for the male, either the actual moment of ejaculation; or the 'last bit of lurching before launch'. -the awareness that several moments will have to pass (if you're lucky) before re-charge.
after all the labor invested in sex, cock sadness is a sad and inevitable truth.
by michael foolsley December 2, 2009
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going bad

the body muscles atrophying and turning to fat
used in medicine re: patient status ie: hes' going bad
rotting milk, fruit, vegetables
cheryl once had a perky butt, but upon looking in a mirror; realized it was going bad!
by michael foolsley November 24, 2009
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beer ejack

when your beer suddenly decides to foam up and over the bottle top, -whether a fresh beer or not! (fresh having the most 'vigor'!)

-like the human version, one can never know EXACTLY at what moment this messy event is going to occur! if you're lucky, you can get your mouth over the bottle, before you get the 'pee'!! (-sometimes one can 'put this carbonation to work' (see action, my reaction!) for 'giggles'!)
eyeing beer suspiciously...one second! i think i'm in for a beer ejack!

my beer did a beer ejack, i had to hit the 'porcelain room' to

'mop up'!!

a salesman was in foolsley's selling beer ejack gloves!!
by michael foolsley February 26, 2010
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methane disciple

one who prays to/worships all that is the grand glory of farting!, the noise, the buttle massage, the smell, the reaction of the non-worshipper!! foods that promote gas!
john was in heaven! he had found a methane disciple who was female!

john was such a methane disciple he encouraged her to fart in his face!!
by michael foolsley December 10, 2009
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fuck-er or fuck-ee

supplier and receiver

ie: whos' going to drive? are you so tired you, "can't do much"
sometimes it is not readily apparent who will be the fuck-er or fuck-ee. -during the holiday season especially, it is probably better to give than receive! now, supposing both parties plan to give? -simple! keep a fire extinguisher nearby!!!!!!!!!
by michael foolsley November 23, 2009
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not having a shittin' damn thing

a state for the 'living-challenged'! whistling for money hasn't worked out, neither has the shaking of the ass! -being floated is a 'dead end street', so how does one survive??

these are all considerations for the 'damned' one; 'not having a shittin' damn thing'. this is real fun to accuse friends of, too: they go, huh? -you can even add that old college flair by changing it to: you aint'snt gotta shittin' damn thing! one MUST be able to 'speak to impress' when dealing with employers, 'officials', little lord fauntleroys, etc...

were a 'lingual translator' actually to 'pick the statement apart', it would probably loosely be translated thus; you are such a douche-bag you can't even produce a turd. -throwing in 'damn' sort of colors the statement, or perhaps curses or dooms the scenario.

the beauty of the statement is its' final verbal polish on the tongue! it just rolls off like a fine wine sauce, plus! you get to sound highly educated!! -so, how can you lose? such a win-win situation for all!... -the stuffed-shirts all go huh? and the 'hop-heads' all nod approvingly!! ('shittin' can be replaced with 'shitting' for graduate students!!)
she wasn't used to not having a shittin' damn thing, and had to cut him loose!

get wise! you aint'snt gotta shittin' damn thing!

he accused his friend of not having a shitting damn thing!
by michael foolsley January 29, 2010
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reading therapy

a means of distracting the mind, as well as absorbing, facts and/or information. of course, for this to be of any use, it is helpful to actually LIKE to read; as well as have the ability to do so! (ie: dyslexia, etc.)

reading was useful to me as a youth when few would 'hang' with me. reading became my 'drugs'!! , granting me the ability to 'take a trip' into another world!

(note: recommended by mental health professionals!!, along with exercise!!)
i'm going to opt for some reading therapy tonight, i'm worn out from worrying!

put you out of my mind, with some reading therapy!
by michael foolsley December 15, 2010
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