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john gaskell's definitions

bouncer

The couple of fat wankers that stand outside most clubs in Britain on Friday or Saturday night. Their role is to keep any trouble in the club to a minimum and only let decent people inside. They usually start all the trouble and lech around underage girls for effect, but, in truth they have incredibly small penises and do to many steds to give a girl a decent one. Whereas the likes of me, I'm quite partial to giving the girls exactly what they need
" a fat bouncer kicked off on saturday night and ended up getting his cunt kicked in by 5 fella's, I fuckin loved the scene "
by John Gaskell March 12, 2004
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Super

A Super Strength can of Lager usually around 9% Vol. also: Purple Tin,Speccy and Super Duper
LAD A: " I'm fuckin really sorry lad, I'd had 7 Super's "
LAD B: " yeh I know but, tryin to finger me mum, thats out of order lad!"
LAD A: "I can't remember, I'm fuckin sorry"
LAD B: "It's not good enough ye cunt "
LAD A: "Do ye fancy a pint? "
LAD B: "Alright then cunt, thats a good start "
by John Gaskell March 20, 2004
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Old Man Ronk

A baldy fellow around late 50's who sits in the hut window by the gates of VSEL shipyard in Birkenhead pretending to be a security guard while hooded up, pissed up & extremely late workers run past the window and laugh heartily around the corner while he attempts to give chase.
EMPLOYEE A: " fancy another Stella?"
EMPLOYEE B: "Its 1:15pm,we're already late!"
EMPLOYEE A: "so,go through the Vickers gates"
EMPLOYEE B: "what about the security guard?"
EMPLOYEE A: "What!!!Old Man Ronk?? your havin a Giraffe aren't ye? just jog past the cunt"
by John Gaskell March 20, 2004
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Nice & Laughin'

A state of extreme happiness mainly due to a large amount of money coming ones way,a good sexual encounter or a nice high from a variety of drugs
" I'm was out all weekend with that Tax Rebate money, fanny everywhere. Nice & Laughin'!! "
by John Gaskell March 20, 2004
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Skol

LAD A: " want a can? "
LAD B: " go ed then, I need a hair of the dog "
LAD A: " get your mouth round this bad boy "
(produces a can of Skol)
LAD B: " you can go & get fucked, I thought you were a mate, thats us finished I'm off down the Gauntlet "
by John Gaskell March 21, 2004
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Stella Artois

A Reassuringly expensive Lager of 5.2& abv. Turns a fellow from a small biscuit arsed dweeb into a kebab munchin groch, willing to pagger with anyone who doesn't agree with him.
" call forth the power of 9 Stella's and I'll bail you out of the Bridewell if you haven't caused too much trouble "
by John Gaskell March 21, 2004
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Fat Eyed

A Cannabis induced state causing your eyes to go red and fat looking, your eyelids to cover half the eyeball and your mouth to stay in a permantly fixed grin
(LAD A walks through Liverpool City Centre on his own Fat Eyed)
LAD A: " everyone knows I'm Blitzed, they're all looking at me, this is horrible "
by John Gaskell March 21, 2004
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