3 definitions by guerrillajoey
A common hair style choice of douchebags in which a full head of hair is manipulated in such a way as to simulate a mohawk. Typically, a douchehawk is employed to imply that in an alternate universe one might consider expressing a rebellious attitude via their hair, but the current status quo forbids it. Douchehawks can be seen at Republican Youth rallies, frat parties, and Rascal Flatts concerts.
"Well then, that's a finely crafted douchehawk you've got there, frosted tips and everything! It complements the popped collar on you pink Polo shirt! You've really got a knack for appearing subversive while retaining the hair on the sides of your head!"
"Yo, thankz, brah. I'm working on my flavor-saver next!"
"Yo, thankz, brah. I'm working on my flavor-saver next!"
by guerrillajoey December 11, 2009
A young woman with unfortunately low self-esteem and probably severe daddy issues who insists on seeking attention from the douchiest people imaginable, fratboys. Commonly travel in groups, emitting cute, chirpy commentary on whatever flavored rum they are drinking that particular evening as they parade into the front doors of various frat houses. Prone to spending a lot of money on pregnancy tests upon waking up on the floors of said frat houses with roofie hangovers.
"Dude, check out that poor frathag. Too bad she's somebody's daughter."
"I know, I know. I wonder if she's up to five abortions yet?"
"I know, I know. I wonder if she's up to five abortions yet?"
by guerrillajoey December 13, 2009
Those flakey suburban kids who pretend to be hippies and demonstrate their love of nature by driving obnoxious SUVs all over it. Easily identified in oversized gas-guzzlers plastered with Dave Matthews and Patagonia stickers, hummer hippies are drawn toward large outdoor music festivals where they injest large quantities of illicit substances and leave behind huge deposits of litter and debris. Longitudinal studies have demonstrated that these hypocritical enemies of nature are actually the larvae of careless corporate stooges, and upon reaching maturity and dropping their stupid nicknames they will assume their predestined roles (lucrative careers) with the same abject lack of concern for the welfare of the planet as demonstrated by their republican-voting parents.
"Hey, check out that tank full of hummer hippies! Wonder if that belongs to daddy or if the owner tapped into his trust fund."
"Wow, think of all the hungry people that hummer hippie could have fed if he had chosen a more sensible form of transport."
"Wow, think of all the hungry people that hummer hippie could have fed if he had chosen a more sensible form of transport."
by guerrillajoey November 5, 2010