geekmalone's definitions

Winged Monkeys in the Media

All of the subservient little morons in the media who deliver the DNC's message to the masses. The message, although usually destructive to the country, is delivered in a sing-songity "Aren't we glad we're all part of this" tone which drives its acceptance.

"The Winged Monkeys in the Media will say this is all normal and natural, you are only imagining higher prices for groceries, Ukraine is a democracy, and Trump is Hitler's lying taint."
--Scott Adams on X

by geekmalone July 1, 2024

Does anyone have any questions?

I am a soulless corporate fuckwad.

Whenever you hear "Does anyone have any questions?" after a long speech of zero value; you know you're dealing with a soulless corporate fuckwad.

by geekmalone November 5, 2020

The High School Vanity Continuation Industry

The industry of service providers that allow adults to continue their vain high school lifestyles into adulthood.

Facebook and Twitter are two of the biggest companies in The High School Vanity Continuation Industry. Who would have ever thought that a billion people wanted to continue high school bullshit into adulthood?

by geekmalone May 5, 2020

Diversity Overload

Similar to an electrical overload, but with diversity.

Mike: I'm getting a Diversity Overload with all of this diversity talk on TV and at work...
Jen: Check out my new "Kente" scarf.
Mike: Are you fucking kidding me right now?

by geekmalone June 19, 2020

Zuckerberg Grant

Money given to county election boards by Mark Zuckerberg so he can control their elections.

Mike: Baby, we can finally buy that boat, and maybe even another car!
Jen: What have I told you about wasting our money on lotto tickets?
Mike: This isn't lotto. Down at the election board, we just received a $3M grant from The Center for Tech and Civic Life. Everybody is getting a big raise!

Jen: That's a Zuckerberg Grant...
Mike: The Twitter Guy? No this is a special organization for helping election boards. They provide free training and election administration.
Jen: Zuckerberg is the Facebook Guy. He's the money behind that organization. Aren't you suspicious about a billionaire buying his way into the election process?
Mike: Yeah maybe, but we're finally gonna get that boat we've wanted!
Jen: You wanted... That whole Zuckerberg Grant thing sounds totally fucking bogus to me.
Mike: Yeah but a new boat, Honey...

by geekmalone March 16, 2021

fuck up my narrative

To deliver facts that hurt my comfortable little bubble of idiocy.

Mike: I wish Republicans had at least the minimal level of respect for women and people of color...
Jen: Republicans picked up 10 seats in the House in the 2020 election. Most were women and people of color.
Mike: Don't fuck up my narrative!

by geekmalone December 4, 2020

badigity

The little items that come along with the product you bought such as little cables, brushes, cords, adapters etc. You're not sure if you will need them later, so you keep them along with the box that the product came in. But you never use them. Badigity grows over time and can become dangerous if not controlled.

The Johnson household suffered from a severe case of badigity. Eventually a professional had to be called in to address the problem.

by geekmalone August 2, 2020