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Mike: Let's take a selfie together in our new car.
Jen: Why? That's just weird.
Mike: Come on... We're just like the people in the brochure!
Jen: I've been meaning to talk to you about this.
Mike: What baby? We have a trendy apartment, great fashion sense, and now a new car.
Jen: I'm worried that you suffer from Getty Imagery.
Mike: That stock photo thing?
Jen: Yes. Our apartment sucks, you look like shit most of the time, and we'll be paying for that car for 7 years.
Mike: Yeah but the photo is the only thing that matters. I can post it on all my social media accounts.
Jen: Hmm.
Jen: Why? That's just weird.
Mike: Come on... We're just like the people in the brochure!
Jen: I've been meaning to talk to you about this.
Mike: What baby? We have a trendy apartment, great fashion sense, and now a new car.
Jen: I'm worried that you suffer from Getty Imagery.
Mike: That stock photo thing?
Jen: Yes. Our apartment sucks, you look like shit most of the time, and we'll be paying for that car for 7 years.
Mike: Yeah but the photo is the only thing that matters. I can post it on all my social media accounts.
Jen: Hmm.
by geekmalone June 4, 2024
Get the Getty Imagery mug.Gates: I hereby call the September 2022 meeting of the Democrat Inner Circle Society "DICS" to order.
Buffett: Okay let's get down to business. Can we decide the winners of all elections in November 2022 like we did in 2020?
Gates: Uh... no.
Bezos: The state legislatures tripped us up in almost every state with new "Voter Integrity Laws".
Buffett: I'll be Goddamned if the citizens think they can choose their own representatives! We need a new scheme.
Fink: Sir? I have an idea... I've been thinking about it. Our main obstacle is poll watchers. They're watching for things like thumb drives and bins full of fake ballots. But poll watchers are humans, and humans need sleep after about 16 hours. We need to create a delay that pushes the vote processing out longer than 16 hours. Then we will have unmonitored power to choose the winners.
Buffett: I think I like it... But how will we delay the processing?
Fink: We tell the voters that there are equipment problems.
Buffett: So the voters stand there waiting to vote?
Fink: No. The voters will be allowed to vote, but we'll tell them that they need to put their ballots into "secure boxes" so they can be scanned later when the machines are working. Then after the poll watchers leave, we swap out the boxes of real ballots for boxes of fake ballots.
Buffett: I love it! Okay that's THE PLAN 2022! Well what the hell are we waiting for?
Buffett: Okay let's get down to business. Can we decide the winners of all elections in November 2022 like we did in 2020?
Gates: Uh... no.
Bezos: The state legislatures tripped us up in almost every state with new "Voter Integrity Laws".
Buffett: I'll be Goddamned if the citizens think they can choose their own representatives! We need a new scheme.
Fink: Sir? I have an idea... I've been thinking about it. Our main obstacle is poll watchers. They're watching for things like thumb drives and bins full of fake ballots. But poll watchers are humans, and humans need sleep after about 16 hours. We need to create a delay that pushes the vote processing out longer than 16 hours. Then we will have unmonitored power to choose the winners.
Buffett: I think I like it... But how will we delay the processing?
Fink: We tell the voters that there are equipment problems.
Buffett: So the voters stand there waiting to vote?
Fink: No. The voters will be allowed to vote, but we'll tell them that they need to put their ballots into "secure boxes" so they can be scanned later when the machines are working. Then after the poll watchers leave, we swap out the boxes of real ballots for boxes of fake ballots.
Buffett: I love it! Okay that's THE PLAN 2022! Well what the hell are we waiting for?
by geekmalone November 16, 2022
Get the THE PLAN 2022 mug.Cancel Culture is on full display in the riots of 2020. The rioters are burning down cities and nothing is being done about it. Many Mayors are sympathetic to the rioters' grievances, so there is no response to the violence. In the meantime, business owners who have paid millions in taxes over the years to the government for protection are seeing their businesses destroyed.
by geekmalone July 12, 2020
Get the Cancel Culture mug.An international movement named after a line spoken in the "The Savage Curtain" episode of Star Trek in 1966 where Vulcan character Surak repeatedly cries out "Help me Spock" from behind a rock formation.
Although having its name based on the aforementioned Star Trek episode, the Help Me Spock movement is completely undefined and has been interpreted in many ways, including getting its own song by the band Warp 11 in 2008.
The vague nature of the Help Me Spock movement may very well be the reason for its appeal to millions of followers worldwide.
Although having its name based on the aforementioned Star Trek episode, the Help Me Spock movement is completely undefined and has been interpreted in many ways, including getting its own song by the band Warp 11 in 2008.
The vague nature of the Help Me Spock movement may very well be the reason for its appeal to millions of followers worldwide.
by geekmalone October 17, 2022
Get the Help Me Spock mug.Term coined by Rudy Giuliani to refer to the coordinated effort to steal Donald Trump's victory in the November 3rd 2020 Presidential election.
THE PLAN was the brainchild of Warren Buffet when he exclaimed at a meeting of the DICS (Dem Inner Circle Society) in November 2010 "We can't let these stupid peasants choose their leaders anymore!". All of the other DICS members (Zucky, Bezos, Gates, Dorsey, and Brennan) immediately agreed and the creation of THE PLAN began. Many components of THE PLAN were easy: The cooperation of the county voting boards, the compliance of the main stream media, and the bribing of Judges who might preside over any legal challenges. But some components of THE PLAN were not easy: The acceptance of the Dominion voting system in 13 states, the simultaneous stopping of the vote counting in six states, and the payoffs of members of the Conservative media. As time went by, THE PLAN grew in complexity. In 2016, the DICS tested THE PLAN in Orange County, California. This test was highly successful. Then in 2018, THE PLAN was tested on the entire state of Virginia, also very successful. In 2020, THE PLAN was implemented nationwide to steal the election from Donald Trump. Most of THE PLAN was successful, but there were some glitches, including: The complete dumping of Fox News by Conservatives when Fox hosts sided against Trump, numerous tattle-tale voting board employees who spilled the beans about THE PLAN to Trump's lawyers, and Donald Trump's incredible tenacity. Only time will tell if THE PLAN will be successful in 2020, but its chances of succeeding decrease as more Americans learn about it.
by geekmalone November 19, 2020
Get the THE PLAN mug.People who have become somewhat wealthy due to inheritance or luck; and who are also certain that they are above others, even though they are dumb as fuck.
Every city has its share of smug idiots. They're so fucking proud of themselves. But on closer inspection, you'll see that they're as empty as the post modern bullshit lofts that they live in.
by geekmalone August 16, 2020
Get the smug idiots mug.Mike: Baby, we can finally buy that boat, and maybe even another car!
Jen: What have I told you about wasting our money on lotto tickets?
Mike: This isn't lotto. Down at the election board, we just received a $3M grant from The Center for Tech and Civic Life. Everybody is getting a big raise!
Jen: That's a Zuckerberg Grant...
Mike: The Twitter Guy? No this is a special organization for helping election boards. They provide free training and election administration.
Jen: Zuckerberg is the Facebook Guy. He's the money behind that organization. Aren't you suspicious about a billionaire buying his way into the election process?
Mike: Yeah maybe, but we're finally gonna get that boat we've wanted!
Jen: You wanted... That whole Zuckerberg Grant thing sounds totally fucking bogus to me.
Mike: Yeah but a new boat, Honey...
Jen: What have I told you about wasting our money on lotto tickets?
Mike: This isn't lotto. Down at the election board, we just received a $3M grant from The Center for Tech and Civic Life. Everybody is getting a big raise!
Jen: That's a Zuckerberg Grant...
Mike: The Twitter Guy? No this is a special organization for helping election boards. They provide free training and election administration.
Jen: Zuckerberg is the Facebook Guy. He's the money behind that organization. Aren't you suspicious about a billionaire buying his way into the election process?
Mike: Yeah maybe, but we're finally gonna get that boat we've wanted!
Jen: You wanted... That whole Zuckerberg Grant thing sounds totally fucking bogus to me.
Mike: Yeah but a new boat, Honey...
by geekmalone March 16, 2021
Get the Zuckerberg Grant mug.