fearman's definitions

cryosculophobia

Morbid fear of one's lips making contact and freezing fast to the ice if one slips and falls flat on one's face while ice skating.

I've got cryosculophobia. There's no way I'm going out on these skates without a face guard.

by Fearman January 4, 2008

siderodromophobia

Morbid fear of train travel.

John's got siderodromophobia. When he goes across country he flies, drives or takes the bus.

by Fearman January 4, 2008

Christihomoality

The opposite of Christideuteronoleviticality, which is the corruption of the message of the pale (Jewish) Galilean by the 1500-year-older blatherings of a group of psychotic priests who should have done posterity a great big favour and gone out and gotten shagged a whole lot more often.

Long live Christihomoality. Adam and Steve would have STAYED in the GODDAMNED GARDEN.

by Fearman January 5, 2008

psychic-recursive gene

The gene responsible for making some people believe that anything from homosexuality to kleptomania can be tied to a single gene.

He says he's found a gay gene, an anti-social gene, a literary gene and a deep-sea exploration-promoting gene. I guess his psychic-recursive gene is working overtime.

by Fearman January 6, 2008

necro-reiteration

Mental experience in which you come to believe on numerous occasions that someone must have died a while back, often persisting for many years until you hear for certain in the media that they have just actually died.

I had necro-reiteration about Joan Miro and Evel Knievel for at least a decade before they popped their clogs.

by Fearman January 6, 2008

Dreadful Venereal Disease

Facetious extension of DVD (actually Digital Versatile Disk).

Nothing interesting on the telly tonight, Benny. Stick on a Dreadful Venereal Disease and let's watch it.

by Fearman January 6, 2008

Mel Gibson

"Actor" and director, full name Mellicent Religiosus No Sodomites Please I'm Catholic Gibson, who was born in New York State and made it big in Australia playing a former cop who becomes a hero for a lot of post-Apocalyptic Aussies when you can tell by the look on his face that all he wanted was a Fosters. Often described as anti-Semitic (Jew-hating), and he may very well be ... on a bad day he gives the Jews about one percent of the venom and bile that he reserves for gays. The most consistently homophobic major director of the last twenty years. You don't believe me? Just watch Braveheart, for Chrissakes. Speaking of which, The Passion of the Christ would do as well.

Having said that, he really does have a cute ass.

Quotes from Mel Gibson:

And tell the English ... that they may TAKE our LIEEVES ... but thay'll NEVAHR ... get theer HONDS ... AP oor KELTS!!
- Braveheart (Director's Cut)

Umm ... yes, well, it's a matter of fact that my grandfather was homosexual, and so was that teacher in remedial English that kept giving me detention, and Pontius Pilate, and Satan, and all those guys from South Africa who dumped on the niggers, hey, one of my best buddies was black, you know, and all those Orthodox Jews were homosexual too, and so are the Reform movement, and there are a lot of them out by Alice Springs and Coober Pedy, and I think Martin Luther was homosexual too, yeah, and ...,
- confidentially leaked interview

Danny, c-mere, stick my shoulder joint back in the socket, I'm too pooped, just don't, y'know, get too close, man ...,
- Lethal Weapon 2, Director's Cut

I only hate the Jews when I'm drunk.
- confidentially leaked interview

by Fearman January 6, 2008