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Definitions by djtimyd

constipated duckface 

when you try to do the duckface for a selfie, but you have to take a dump
Guy 1: Sonia looks good of Facebook tonite

Guy 2: yeah but she looks like she needs to take a shit tho

Sonia: Constipated duckface!
when you do something so amazing, you blackout and can't remember doing it
Tad: dude... my legs are sore today
Rod: that's because you jumped over like 8 tables at the bar last night, don't you remember?
Tad: that's amazing but I don't remember...
Rod: dude... you had an amazout!
amazout by djtimyd March 3, 2018

cone crumbs 

The remnants of an ice cream cone left in ones beard, shirt, lap, the table or stuck to your arm.
That cone from Micky D's was so good I still have cone crumbs on my shorts!
cone crumbs by djtimyd August 23, 2017

bag crack 

The crease in the bag that holds tiny tasty morsels. You have to dig and work to get at it, but in the end... jackpot.
man: this bag is empty
woman: did you check the bag crack?
man: ohhhhh! Cheetos dust!
bag crack by djtimyd July 31, 2017

nipplepalooza

When it's so cold outside, you see a veritable smorgasbord of perky nipples.
Man 1: Did you see those two with the pokies walk by?
Man 2: Yeah, it's nipplepalooza out here today!
nipplepalooza by djtimyd July 21, 2017

Constipated wink 

Rather than a suave or coy look while winking, you look like you're trying to take a dump instead.
Woman 1: ohh he is cute
(man constipated winks)
Woman 2: uhhh did he wink or shit his pants?
Constipated wink by djtimyd July 18, 2017