6 definitions by bls1999

If you've ever eaten a burger or a steak, and it's undercooked, you say "A little iodine and that thing could walk again!", implying that it's only a minor cut, and the animal could come back to life if iodine (a cut medicine) was applied.
Waiter: Here's your steak, sir.
Customer: *Cuts into the Steak, sees that it is raw.*
Waiter: Is everything OK?
Customer: Actually, no.
Waiter: What's wrong?
Customer: Weeeell, let's just say... A little iodine and that thing could walk again.
Waiter: Oh, no. Terribly sorry, sir.

But you know he isn't sorry. They never are.
by bls1999 May 26, 2013
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An insurance pee is similar to plain old peeing. The only difference is that the insurance pee is usually taken, regardless of if they need to, when the pee-er isn't sure of when they'll encounter another bathroom.

Insurance pees are usually taken before leaving for an unknown or unfamiliar destination, or upon discovering a bathroom at said destination.
Ben: Mom, are you ready to go?
Susan: Yeah, hold on, let me just take an insurance pee.
by bls1999 July 30, 2018
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A close relative of "you don't know where that's been." Creeping crud is when you don't know what invisible germs and dirt is on a surface and you try not to touch it. The term can also be used to describe an unidentifiable substance, or to describe crud that is, in fact, creeping.
Ex. 1
Keith: Ben, I wouldn't take your shoes off in this smelly locker room; there could be some creeping crud in here.
Ben: Good thinking!

Ex. 2
Keith: What the hell is that?
Ben: Ah, just some creeping crud.
Keith: Right, better steer clear of that shit.

Ex. 3
by bls1999 April 10, 2015
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When you really need to poop, but you're in the middle of doing something. Instead, you rush to the toilet to make a down payment, which means taking part of your poop and quickly returning to the activity that is occupying you. Usually, making a down payment implies that you will return to the toilet and make the rest of your "payment" later, but it doesn't have to.
Keith: Ben, I've got to take a dump.
Ben: But we're in the middle of a game of pool!
Keith: Don't worry, I'll make a down payment. Won't even take a minute.
Ben: *sigh* okay.
by bls1999 September 20, 2014
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The day after Thanksgiving where your family gets cabin fever and begins to hurl obscenities at each other. Also known as Fucksgiving.
Linda: How did everyone like the food last night?
Cletus: It was good, but not great. Like Trump is going to make America.
Linda: Fuck you Cletus, you had to bring politics into this?
*Alex enters*
Alex: Ah, I see Fuckyousgiving came early this year!
by bls1999 November 22, 2018
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Stands for "bend over and smile." It's what you do when you just have to deal with something you're getting screwed on.
Keith: Damnit, I've gotta stay late at work.
Ben: BOAS, dude. You've gotta make a living.
Keith: Psh, alright fine.

Joe: What the hell??? Verizon charges over $100 for my plan.
Keith: BOAS my friend. You know they have the best service in our area.
Joe: Why do you always have to be right, Keith?
by bls1999 February 20, 2015
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