A 7-foot tall cretin with giant, flapping tabs. A mentally retarded twat that can eat 3 fried pigs for breakfast and is therefore detested by its grandfather's wife, who takes the piss out of its ridiculous crash-helmet hairstyle.
Why is there nothing in the fridge, Trace?
We've had a visit from Bullivant. It was hungry after its 3-pig breakfast.
We've had a visit from Bullivant. It was hungry after its 3-pig breakfast.
by Benny Twadge May 03, 2009
Get the Bullivant mug.What's the name of that Jamaican wrestler with the mop on his head?
That's Kofi Kingston and he's no Jamaican. He's from Ghana, which is only about 5,000 miles from Jamaica.
That's Kofi Kingston and he's no Jamaican. He's from Ghana, which is only about 5,000 miles from Jamaica.
by Benny Twadge May 04, 2009
Get the Kofi Kingston mug.The legendary drivers of Maltby lorries who display Pork Scotch's cone in the back in order to taunt important security guards and provide amusement to everyone else. Otherwise known as comic geniuses.
Flobule: Look Dad, the cone's still there! Why don't they take it out?
Dad: Because they're heroes, son. Maltby heroes.
Dad: Because they're heroes, son. Maltby heroes.
by Benny Twadge May 18, 2009
Get the Maltby Heroes mug.Abbreviation of "nignog retard". A spasticated black shit with diarrhoea-juice for brains. Walks around with its gob wide open for catching flies. Only speaks when stating the bloody obvious, for example when it sees someone struggling with 15 Asda carrier bags and asks them "Have you been shopping?".
Have you seen that gormless black shit with its gob wide open?
Yeah, that's the Patrick Road Nogtard. It fell out of its tree and the rest of the chimps won't let it back up.
Yeah, that's the Patrick Road Nogtard. It fell out of its tree and the rest of the chimps won't let it back up.
by Benny Twadge May 03, 2009
Get the Nogtard mug.A retarded, thick-lipped checkout assistant who stares at the ceiling while serving you and grunts instead of speaking.
Dad: Shall we go to Asda then?
Monkus: Only if we can go to David's till.
Dad: David the Grunting Spacker?
Monkus: Yeah. The fat spaz makes me piss.
Monkus: Only if we can go to David's till.
Dad: David the Grunting Spacker?
Monkus: Yeah. The fat spaz makes me piss.
by Benny Twadge June 19, 2009
Get the David the Grunting Spacker mug.A short, stocky man with a shaved head. Close to pensionable age but believes himself to be young and with-it. Drives a small white van. He thinks its cool to cook food outside with his drag-act "girlfriend", believing that sharing a garlic bread at a green plastic table is all that is required for a barbecue. Also known as Mr Boring, Mr Ugly and The Arsehole.
Pork Scotch is a total twat
Its gay to wear a buffalo hat
Your girlfriend's really a man in drag
Your boring face makes people gag
Its gay to wear a buffalo hat
Your girlfriend's really a man in drag
Your boring face makes people gag
by Benny Twadge April 18, 2009
Get the Pork Scotch mug.Name given to someone with a head which is exactly the same shape as a koala's head. Usually only fat bald security guards can achieve this interspecific resemblance. The effect can be heightened if the koala-headed person has his hair cut in the Pork Scotch style.
Why has someone brought a koala to the braaivleis?
They haven't. What you're looking at is the Porky Scotcher. The ugly bastard has a koala head.
They haven't. What you're looking at is the Porky Scotcher. The ugly bastard has a koala head.
by Benny Twadge August 02, 2009
Get the koala head mug.