Valetudo's definitions

National Lottery

A novel way of further taxing poor people.

" Oi know oim dahn to me last quid but oi moight just win the lot-ry!"

by Valetudo December 9, 2003

foy

Foy is actually a term for the smell that accumulates between a mans balls and his arsehole, as in Gringo's arse and foy smell. It is an unusual musty smell that is surprisingly hard to rid despite a decent personal hygiene regime. Often associated with physical activity and sport.

Jesus man! Ive got a terrible case of Foy!

by Valetudo March 25, 2004

Nip & Tuck

When somebody interupts you half way through a crap and you have to stop, nip it off and tuck the remainder back up your ass to finish after chastisting the guilty party for interupting you.

You didnt have to beat my door down for fucks sake! I was trying to have a shit in peace!

by Valetudo March 26, 2004

shatners bassoon

Area within your brain that defines time perception. Can be affected by so called 'Made up drugs' such as 'Cake'; a Visterbile Amphetamoid from Prague. Cake and the effects on shatners bassoon is covered in a episode of the 'Brass Eye' concered with drugs.

One unlucky user died after being run over by a bus, he thought he had 3 months to cross the road.

by Valetudo March 24, 2004

Dead Rat

A used Tampon.

So here I am, having bought here drinks all night. We gets back to my place and I find out she's got a 'Dead Rat' inside her.

by Valetudo March 26, 2004

stroker

Not unlike a wanker but far less credible.

Ah man! That guy takes the Piss! He's a proper stroker!

by Valetudo March 24, 2004

Vampires teabag

A used tampon that if recycled would make a great refreshing brew for a vampire.

So imagine my surpise when i pulled my knob out there was a pungent 'Vampires Teabag' hung on the end like a mordid yoyo!

by Valetudo March 26, 2004