Definitions by The return of light Joker

apples to oranges 

a comparison that is unfair because the subjects cannot be evaluated according to the same criteria

This discussion on who has the most authority in the county is apples to oranges. We are getting nothing done.

apples to oranges by The Return of Light Joker January 16, 2011

flat tire

1. a impotent man

2. a flaccid penis

3. a stupid or useless person

4. the prank of stepping on someone's shoe

He narrowly avoided becoming a flat tire.

flat tire by The Return of Light Joker January 15, 2011

cold mud 

a grave, a place where a dead person is buried

His great uncle was initially believed to be in cold mud. But they found he was alive.

cold mud by The Return of Light Joker January 13, 2011

handyman's special 

something in desperate need of repair that is acquired for a bargain price, especially a house

Those conditions make my house look like a handyman's special.

handyman's special by The Return of Light Joker January 13, 2011

on the front burner

getting immediate attention

If they don't have the task of repairing the car on the front burner, then we will be in a difficult situation.

on the front burner by The Return of Light Joker January 11, 2011

joined at the hip 

absolutely inseparable, (implying as inseparable as conjoined twins attached at the hip)

The pastor was joined at the hip with his church. He just wouldn't leave.

joined at the hip by The Return of Light Joker January 9, 2011

red eye 

1. a cup of coffee with an extra shot of expresso

2. an airline flight, especially one from coast to coast, that
begins late at night and ends in the morning.

3. cheap, strong whiskey.

I bet he's going for a red eye.

red eye by The Return of Light Joker January 4, 2011