The Original Tankboy's definitions
An overpriced weekend boondoggle at a fancy hotel or spa resort under the guise of promoting mental, physical and spiritual health. All the while, guests stay in very posh rooms and are catered to at all stages. Guests ranges from unfortunate 500 CEO's to yoga mat guy to crypto saleswoman. All will brag to their friends how great a life changing experience it was but they inevitably return to their status quo.
Parker: I feel so great after my wellness retreat at Terranea this weekend. Massages, inspirational sorta TED Talks, farm to table organic whole grain paleo single sourced low glycemic gluten free planet friendly meals…it was amazing. I feel like a new man.
Logan: That's not a wellness retreat. That’s a poshness retreat. And you’ll be right back to pimping big pharma as soon as your Tesla is charged.
Parker: Ya, I guess you’re right. Wish they had just given me the $10,000 in stock options. See you later, gotta go get an office to prescribe more of that new late night advertised wonder drug that is marginally better than the old one but at ten times the price.
Logan: That's not a wellness retreat. That’s a poshness retreat. And you’ll be right back to pimping big pharma as soon as your Tesla is charged.
Parker: Ya, I guess you’re right. Wish they had just given me the $10,000 in stock options. See you later, gotta go get an office to prescribe more of that new late night advertised wonder drug that is marginally better than the old one but at ten times the price.
by The Original Tankboy October 5, 2023
Get the Poshness retreat mug.A low budget, broke down, scummy trailer right wing voter fraud conspiracy peddlers claim to live on their voter registration forms in order to commit voter fraud
Normal person 1: I heard Mark Meadows put a dive trailer address on his voter registration so he could vote in North Carolina.
Normal person 2: If it turns out to be true, he should have to live there.
Normal person 1: Right? Maybe he hopes to get a pardon…
Normal person 2: If it turns out to be true, he should have to live there.
Normal person 1: Right? Maybe he hopes to get a pardon…
by The Original Tankboy March 7, 2022
Get the Dive trailer mug.The story of how the Capitol insurrectionists' legal teams realized that their best defense was to push Trump under the bus for inciting the insurrectionists to storm the Capitol.
Normal person 1. Hey, did you see how the treasonous insurrectionists are now rightfully blaming Trump for inciting them to be idiots?
Normal person 2. I sure did. It took four years, but we finally have Dante's Revenge.
Normal person 1. It is a fitting and karmic fate for the scum in chief that "...rejected spiritual values by yielding to bestial appetites or violence, or by perverting their human intellect to fraud or malice against their fellowmen."
Normal person 2. I sure did. It took four years, but we finally have Dante's Revenge.
Normal person 1. It is a fitting and karmic fate for the scum in chief that "...rejected spiritual values by yielding to bestial appetites or violence, or by perverting their human intellect to fraud or malice against their fellowmen."
by The Original Tankboy January 22, 2021
Get the Dante's Revenge mug.Logan: Can’t wait for life to get back to normal.
Parker: That’s not gonna happen. It will be Norma, sorta like normal. We can go shopping or get a drink, but wearing masks and not touching anything, sanitizing everything...
Parker: That’s not gonna happen. It will be Norma, sorta like normal. We can go shopping or get a drink, but wearing masks and not touching anything, sanitizing everything...
by The Original Tankboy May 19, 2020
Get the Norma mug.The world we will be living in after Covid pandemic. Like new normal, neo-normal, sort of normal, almost normal. Aka, bizarre af. The only reason that "normal" is even part of the term is because that will just be the way it is.
Dylan: Hey...want to Facetime while we shop Amazon for back to school hazmat suits? Vans has cool checkerboards.
Taylor: Sure. Remember when we used to actually go to a Vans store? Oh, well, at least things are back to normalish and we even have school.
Taylor: Sure. Remember when we used to actually go to a Vans store? Oh, well, at least things are back to normalish and we even have school.
by The Original Tankboy April 24, 2020
Get the Normalish mug.When doing group meetings, classes or presentations online and clear off all the junk from table level and pile it on the floor so it is not seen. People that don’t normally work from home have to scramble to do this after a colleague lets them know how bad the pile of dishes, clothes, clutter...looks in the background.
Online classes are such a pain. My bff told me I have to do a top down and put everything on the floor so I don’t look like a slob.
by The Original Tankboy March 27, 2020
Get the Top down mug.What too many people do when they online date--complain. And they have no clue that all the other swiper and gripers are saying the same thing about them.
Jennifer--All the guys on this site on such liars and all they want is a hookup. Look at Rick here. That picture is so old. Why do they think I care what car they drive? Hey, what year is that Beemer? Do you think it's leased? Mmmm...looks like he lives on the Bay...
April--Stop your swipin' and gripin'. You been on that UnhingedPlentyofBumLames site for six months. Two boob jobs later and and you're still cashing your ex's checks so now he can't afford his Porsche lease anymore.
Jennifer--Whatever, I'm so over him, he was such a narcissist. Want me to see if Rick has a friend?
April--Sure...
April--Stop your swipin' and gripin'. You been on that UnhingedPlentyofBumLames site for six months. Two boob jobs later and and you're still cashing your ex's checks so now he can't afford his Porsche lease anymore.
Jennifer--Whatever, I'm so over him, he was such a narcissist. Want me to see if Rick has a friend?
April--Sure...
by The Original Tankboy January 1, 2020
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