Definitions by The Great White Monkey
Chicken Eater
1. Something or someone who completely betrays their duty to protect. A term rooted in rural grit that describes a total failure of guardianship—turning the protector into the predator.
The Farm Dog (Literal): A guard dog or watchdog deployed to secure the chicken coop, only to start hunting, killing, and eating the livestock it was hired to defend. Once a dog becomes a chicken eater, it can never be trusted on security detail again.
The Human (Figurative): An adult who harms, abuses, or preys upon someone weaker than themselves whom they were entrusted to protect and care for. The ultimate domestic betrayal—when the guardian turns out to be the greatest threat inside the house.
The Farm Dog (Literal): A guard dog or watchdog deployed to secure the chicken coop, only to start hunting, killing, and eating the livestock it was hired to defend. Once a dog becomes a chicken eater, it can never be trusted on security detail again.
The Human (Figurative): An adult who harms, abuses, or preys upon someone weaker than themselves whom they were entrusted to protect and care for. The ultimate domestic betrayal—when the guardian turns out to be the greatest threat inside the house.
Example 1: "We thought old Buster was keeping the coyotes away from the coop, but yesterday we caught him red-pawed. Turns out he's a grade-A chicken eater."
Example 2: "Any adult who preys on the vulnerable instead of shielding them is nothing more than a chicken eater."
Example 2: "Any adult who preys on the vulnerable instead of shielding them is nothing more than a chicken eater."
Chicken Eater by The Great White Monkey November 1, 2026
Wall Cricket
A popular slang term and cultural trope referring to a smoke detector with a dead battery that "chirps" every minute. It is specifically used to describe a common African American stereotype where the inhabitants of a home have become so accustomed to the high-pitched beep that they completely tune it out, even while filming videos or talking on speakerphone.
Twitch Chat: "I can't even focus on the gameplay with that wall cricket chirping in his living room."
Wall Cricket by The Great White Monkey April 26, 2026
Alphabet Circus
Alphabet Circus by The Great White Monkey June 30, 2023
Devil's Ass Crack
Any tight spot between two large objects where in important things can get stuck or lost ie: between the kitchen stove and the refrigerator.
John: Becky have you seen the oven mitt?
Becky: the last I saw John, it was on top of the refrigerator.
John: Crap Becky! It's fallen and now it's stuck in the Devil's Ass Crack.
Becky: the last I saw John, it was on top of the refrigerator.
John: Crap Becky! It's fallen and now it's stuck in the Devil's Ass Crack.
Devil's Ass Crack by The Great White Monkey June 12, 2023
Wilting Lilly
This term is used to describe a man who is utterly overwhelmed by insignificant circumstances and who often proclaimes his discomfort loudly and expects others to sympathize with his circumstances.
Jenny: Hey Alice I haven't seen your husband today. Is he alright?
Alice: he's fine he just drank too much last night and he's really hungover. He's been in bed all day and I have to wait on him hand and foot.
Jenny: Wow, he's such a wilting Lilly.
Fred: hey Bill would you like to go fishing today?
Bill: no Fred there's a 10% chance of rain today and I don't want to risk getting pneumonia.
Fred: Geez Bill aren't you the wilting Lily.
See also:
Pussy
Pansy
Buttercup
Millennial
Alice: he's fine he just drank too much last night and he's really hungover. He's been in bed all day and I have to wait on him hand and foot.
Jenny: Wow, he's such a wilting Lilly.
Fred: hey Bill would you like to go fishing today?
Bill: no Fred there's a 10% chance of rain today and I don't want to risk getting pneumonia.
Fred: Geez Bill aren't you the wilting Lily.
See also:
Pussy
Pansy
Buttercup
Millennial
Wilting Lilly by The Great White Monkey January 18, 2023
roach tennis
The act of fumigating (bug bombing) your apartment thereby sending your roaches fleeing into the adjacent apartments only to have them fumigate shortly afterwards sending what's left of yours plus theirs back into your place. This process is repeated until someone runs out of money for bug bombs. The first person to do so loses the game and gets stuck with the majority of the roaches.
Johnny had been saving up to buy an entire case of bug bombs and felt certain he could win this months game of roach tennis
roach tennis by The Great White Monkey September 20, 2022
Terminal Diarrhea
(tur-muh-nuhl dai-ur-ee-uh) : noun : Not to be confused with Terminal Poop Disorder, Terminal Diarrhea is an affliction that can have many different cuases. For example harsh medications, food poisoning or binge drinking to name just a few. The main characteristic of this affliction is that The afflicted is 100% sure that they are about to shit themselves to death (in some cases rightfully so).
"Bill are you okay in there?" asked Susie knocking on the bathroom door.
"No!" exclaimed Bill "I've been drinking Mad Dog 2020 for a week now, my insides are hanging out of my asshole and I think I'm going to shit myself to death".
"Oh no" say's Susie sadly "Bill, I think you have Terminal Diarrhea"
See also: Explosive Diarrhea
"No!" exclaimed Bill "I've been drinking Mad Dog 2020 for a week now, my insides are hanging out of my asshole and I think I'm going to shit myself to death".
"Oh no" say's Susie sadly "Bill, I think you have Terminal Diarrhea"
See also: Explosive Diarrhea
Terminal Diarrhea by The Great White Monkey April 6, 2021