Definitions by Studs Lonigan III

Peeing On The Poo 

A phrase used to break the silence when you enter a Men's bathroom and there are empty urinals, but a guy is using the stall standing up facing forward. There are only a few reasons that man is using the stall, that way: Stage fright, doing coke, waiting for a gay guy, or breaking up an unflushed piece of poo with his piss stream.

Nick walks into a men's bathroom at a pub and notices empty urinals and a guy pissing face forward in a stall.

Nick: Hey, you peeing on the poo?

Stall guy: (sniffs & flushes toilet) Haha.

Peeing On The Poo by Studs Lonigan III November 24, 2024

Punch Bun 

(n) A variation of the childhood game where kids traveling through the country would encounter a Volkswagen Beetle and the first kid to see a punch bug (VW) yells "PUNCH BUG" and punches someone in the arm. Yet, this is when someone witnesses a man wearing a Man Bun in public, whether it be at a coffee house, bar, gender-neutral bathroom, or in the general public, the person punches the other person on the arm and yells "PUNCH BUN".

(Nick sees a guy with a man bun and punches Bill in the arm)

Bill: Agghh! What the fuck, Nick?

Nick: (pointing to the guy with the man bun) Punch Bun, motherfucker!

Bill: Ah, game on. Do you want to get an espresso?

(The guy with the man bun walks by Nick & Bill and sighs)

Punch Bun by Studs Lonigan III November 24, 2024

Bloody Cheery 

n. (Prison Slang) The result of a new prison inmate getting butt-fucked so hard by multiple other inmates that the unfortunate inmate's butthole plumes, fissures, and pulsates to the state of looking like a cherry sweating and constantly bleeding out like a slow-waking volcano.

Two prison inmates meeting in the yard:

Quantrell: Yo, Rayshawn, why you all stiff rubbing yo neck n shit?

Rayshawn: Damn, Quanz, you see that new faggy-looking crackhead kid here? You know with all that crackhead-looking shit on he face and that homo hair-doo?

Quantrell: Oh, you talking 'bout Artesian Kevvy?

Rayshawn: Yup, dat bitch. Well, I just saw Big Bruce done Bloody Cheery that white boy! I'm talking HARD Bloody Cheery. When Bruce done and I saw dat kid asshoe, I didn't know if I was looking at wrecked asshoe or Clifford the Big Red Dog gnawing on Elmo while choking on twenty Twizzlers. That Bloody Cheery nasty, yo.

Bloody Cheery by Studs Lonigan III November 11, 2024

Clay Pigeons 

A term referring to when you are in a business meeting and everyone is at a standstill on new ideas or a compromise. Nothing has progressed after hours. So everyone throws new, lucid, off-fangled ideas out into the open. It's a metaphor that comes from a hunting exercise, where to prep for a hunt, one shoots clay pigeons instead of real pigeons. You're just throwing stuff up in the air -- hopefully something hits. Akin to throwing darts until someone hits close to the bullseye.

Nick: Hey, Alissa Heinerscheid, we've been at this business proposal for hours and it's going nowhere. Let's just throw up some clay pigeons and see if something hits. I'll let you start.

Alissa Heinerscheid: Well Nick there's this one LGTBQ+ influencer out there...

Nick: Get the FUCK OUT OF MY OFFICE! (Holds recording device to his mouth) Note to self: No more trannie-influencer-ideas and hey, waiter, "I'll take two clay pigeons to go".

Clay Pigeons by Studs Lonigan III October 30, 2023

Pubservation 

Pub-zur-vey-shuhn

an act or instance of noticing or perceiving while conversing at a pub.

an act or instance of regarding attentively or watching certain occurrences that only happen at a pub.

Nick: Is it just me or do you see that nasty looking whore mongering around these skangers to get free drinks?

Johnny: You're right, hell! I just bought that cunt a drink earlier. Nick, me boy, that's a great pubservation.

Pubservation by Studs Lonigan III October 28, 2023

Shithead Duty

A statement, reprimand, or admonishment handed down to someone lower in the ranks of a work environment, mainly in the service industry or trades, especially in restaurant or bar service. Saying that they have to do the shitty work for the night. This is specially reserved for when the person is reprimanded and is doomed to serve the non-tipping customers for the night.

Nick: Eric, You showed up 20 minutes late for work. You're on shithead duty for the night. Serve table six their bread.

Eric: (Looks at the table of ten black customers) Damn, I'm not making any tips tonight. I'll never show up late to work again.

Shithead Duty by Studs Lonigan III September 13, 2023

LMNOP 

Describing a person's long-winded story that is either a go-nowhere diatribe or an ill-fangled tangent that goes on and on to no end or point. A proper story between friends is an ABC or XYZ story. A beginning, middle, and end. An LMNOP story is completely meandering, all filler and fluff with no structure. A waste of time.

Nick: Hey Bill, did you listen to Ralph's story he was trying to tell? He must be on coke or something.

Bill: Yeah, he was straight LMNOP on that one. I had no clue where he was going or ending with that story. I'm glad I walked away.

LMNOP by Studs Lonigan III September 13, 2023