Solid Mantis's definitions

Walk-in

What every appointment really is when you don't drive a car.

Front desk-Did you want to schedule a walk-in?
Guy-Well I walked here, so this is a wake-up like any other for me.
Front desk-Oh yea, I meant...
Guy-I know what you meant, you might as well schedule a walk-in then.

by Solid Mantis March 25, 2018

Band saw

A cutting tool.

Guy- The guy made me an offer I couldnt refuse, so I cut his arm off with my band saw and sold the meat. It wouldn't have made a good piece of furniture.

by Solid Mantis August 29, 2020

Outriders

Outsiders with an r instead of an s, which is original. It seems to be about a group that lands in a world they're not from, trying to invade it like they own it. The natives are, of course, hostile toward them, knowing they're going to keep taking, and try to run the natives off their own land in the process. Kind of like Spaceballs without the humorous parts.

Outriders seems like a game for dorks by dorks.

by Solid Mantis April 9, 2021

Violent

A guy who threatens to stab somebody with a fork should be leaving the person alone rather than making threats, even if he's not going to stab anybody. Especially if he hasn't proven to the guy he says it to that he's trustworthy.

Life is not Shutter Island, Shutter Island was a movie. The reality is all human beings are as violent as they come.

by Solid Mantis June 20, 2018

Crabs

Cranky 8 legged freaks armed with pincers.

Like crabs to a wounded bird, they proceeded to surround that guy and shred him to a bloody pulp with their pincers, prying at his flesh.

by Solid Mantis April 9, 2021

Spider sense

A sixth sense that tingles when there's something else wrong with someone or something.

Spidey-I think there's something else wrong with the guy, my spider sense is tingling.
Other guy-Something else wrong with the guy besides the alien he just gave birth to out of his stomach? What do you know that I don't know spider man?

by Solid Mantis August 24, 2018

Getaway helicopter

There are people who do it that way. They don't get away in a car they get away in damn helicopter!

They left the roof of the building they hit in the getaway helicopter.

by Solid Mantis May 5, 2017