Russell Clark's definitions

Forward AWOL Recovery Team

The Forward AWOL Recovery Team, or FART is small body of soldiers, usually including the AWOL soldier's squad leader and several members of the AWOL soldier's own platoon that is informally composed by the Platoon Sergeant and/or Platoon Leader for "executing AWOL recovery procedures." Intelligence as to the nearby whereabouts of the AWOL soldier must be considered reliable and the FART must be fielded and report back to duty before the team members are noticed missing by the Company Commander (CC), unless the CC is complicit and can provide a plausible cover story to the Battalion Commander (BC) to buy time for the FART's operations.

Internal military memos issued by National Guard two star generals and above have made clear that commanders at all levels are to be held accountable for controlling manageable losses, which certainly suggests to lower level commanders a real need for the Forward AWOL Recovery Team (FART). According to these memos, "commanders must retain at least 85 percent of soldiers who are scheduled to end their active duty and 90 percent of soldiers scheduled to ship for Initial Entry Training, and execute the AWOL recovery procedures for every AWOL soldier." It is largely for this reason that the practice by lower level commanders of aggressively and secretly issuing FART's is likely to continue.

by Russell Clark January 13, 2007

identity deficit disorder

Otherwise known as IDD, a relatively rare disorder characterized by a notable lack of original, which is to say, innovative, interesting or humorous ideas. Like Rabies, the first symptom of this "disease" is a developing fear in the victim that they may indeed be a sufferer. This leads the sufferer of IDD to develop various tactics and strategies for masking this deficit of metaphysical presence, for example, keeping one's mentor(s) in the closet and isolated from one's social circles so that one's frequent parroting of the mentor's wisdom and witticisms is not detected and can be passed off as one's own. Another common tactic of a sufferer of IDD is the practice of recycling of endearments.

The character Howard Crick played by Will Farrell in the popular film, Stranger than Fiction (2006) provides us with as good an example as any of a person suffering from what might be termed "identity deficit disorder".

What Derrida has effectively accused all thinkers of suffering from when he proved that metaphysical presence is mere illusion.

Tommy frequently recycled the ideas and suggestions of his friends and acquaintances. And in this way at least put up a passable appearance of having a personality to call his own. If Tommy ever did have an idea of his very own no one ever knew it since it'd invariably die on the vine before he could tell anyone.

by Russell Clark December 6, 2006

check my spam

Checking one's email though certain one has received no important communication. Compulsively and frequently checking one's email when one is not expecting an important message.

Between friends in a cybercafe: "Hey could you hurry up so I can get on and check my email?" "Who are you kidding, little bro, you know all your email buddies have dropped you like a brick!" "Yeah, I gotta check my spam. . . vamoose!"

by Russell Clark December 6, 2006

kurkle

Snoring while phlegm is caught in one's throat.

He liked to hear her kurkle in her sleep after getting good head from his girlfriend.

by Russell Clark September 24, 2003

chirrens

A term of possible Southern US origin connoting a group of half-siblings, each of whom possesses a different babydaddy and on one or more of whom's behalf the mother receives a crazy check. The term posseses no singular form and is distinct in meaning from the similar term, chirren, which is a simple corruption of the standard English, children.

After Suzy won the lotto last year she went Parish Chilton big time and like crazy fast, fried and dyed her hair, got Botox, Lipo and boob implants and then moved with her passle of chirrens into that abandoned mansion of a spec house there in Collyel - you know, the one with the large swimming pool shaped like the Jim Beam bottle. But wouldn't you know it. . . it wasn't long after this that each of those chirrens' babydaddies came out of the woodwork to show sudden interest in the welfare of his respective child. You know, I think one of the jokers even tried to claim that he had paternity over all of the children!

by Russell Clark December 6, 2006

iatrogenia

Of or pertaining to infectious diseases contracted through exposure to a medical treatment or facility or to medical complications caused by a physician's prescribed course of treatment.

Every episode of the popular series, House, MD is an entertaining study in the horrors of iatrogenia.

by Russell Clark December 7, 2006

Prozagra

A fusion of the drug names, Prozac and Viagra. A cocktail of medications or herbal supplements that elevates both mood and libido or produces a beneficial effect on both by elevating either.

Jim must have started on Prozagra or something. Lately he seems to have taken out a new lease on life!

by Russell Clark December 3, 2006