28 definitions by Rev. Johnny Blumpkin
by Rev. Johnny Blumpkin January 30, 2018
A form of extreme anxiety about being canceled or impending cancellation due to a history of either out-right or secretive socially unacceptable behavior in one's past. This condition can also manifest due to things that you said or did that USED to be acceptable being deemed unacceptable in current times. This type of worry is especially common among celebrities or political candidates.
Many comedians suffer from Cancelitis Nervosa due to a history of saying risque things in their performances that have become much more problematic in modern times and threaten to derail their careers.
by Rev. Johnny Blumpkin October 13, 2022
An ailment that afflicts young children and invokes feelings of constant boredom, disappointment and unfulfillment. These emotions are usually in spite of an abundance of trips to the park, treats and presents. They then express these ideas verbally ad nauseum, in high pitched and annoying tones of voice.
Parent: My kid always complains about how we never do anything fun and that it's unfair. It's all the time doc...
Pediatrician: sounds like your child is suffering from Whinabifida.
Parent: How do you treat that?
Pediatrician: Acetaminophen and a pillow over their face while they're sleeping.
Pediatrician: sounds like your child is suffering from Whinabifida.
Parent: How do you treat that?
Pediatrician: Acetaminophen and a pillow over their face while they're sleeping.
by Rev. Johnny Blumpkin June 15, 2019
The act of ejaculating inside a woman's vagina while she is menstruating, sucking out the mixture of semen and menses whilst eating her out, then finally, passing the concoction into her mouth during kissing. It is a three part process that involves period sex, felching and snow-balling.
This new girl I am dating is a total freak, she's on the rag and asked for a Strawberry Shortcake. So I busted a nut in her bloody pussy, slurped that shit out while munching her box then spit that shit in her mouth.
by Rev. Johnny Blumpkin September 27, 2023
Guard #1: How was your well being check?
Guard #2: I walked past cell 31 and inmate Jones was sitting on his bunk, but I think he was sleeping...
Guard #1: Oh, so he was Methadozing?
Guard #2: Oh yeah... he did just take Methadone at med pass.
Guard #2: I walked past cell 31 and inmate Jones was sitting on his bunk, but I think he was sleeping...
Guard #1: Oh, so he was Methadozing?
Guard #2: Oh yeah... he did just take Methadone at med pass.
by Rev. Johnny Blumpkin May 18, 2018
Inuit slang for an eskimo woman's vagina. To be inside of it is a wonder of nature as it is both sludgy and moist but subzero in temperature at the same time.
Nanook loved his wife, but hated how cold his lovesicle would get when he would stick it in her polar whortex.
by Rev. Johnny Blumpkin February 2, 2019
The mix of pus and menses that drips from a woman's birth canal after an abortion procedure. It is high in vitamins, and definitely leaves a dark Kool-Aid mustache.
by Rev. Johnny Blumpkin February 19, 2019