bird box challenge

The act of imitating the movie Bird Box, and challenging yourself to complete an otherwise innocuous or petty task while blindfolded.

Guy 1: you wanna try the Bird Box Challenge?
Guy 2: Sure, what do I have to do?
Guy 1: Put on this blindfold and try to cross the street without looking.
Guy 2: Sounds kinda dangerous.
Guy 1: You never know when you'll need this skill man. Everyone's doing it!
Guy 2: Ok... **(puts on blindfold and starts walking across the street, then gets hit by a bus)**
Guy 1: Beautiful.

by Rev. Johnny Blumpkin January 02, 2019

adrian peterson'd

The act of a child getting their ass whooped by their parent for a petty reason.

Last week I was picking my daughter up from school, when another kid dropped his backpack on the ground and got totally Adrian Peterson'd by his dad.

by Rev. Johnny Blumpkin March 01, 2018

Swamp Dust

The flakes of skin that line your underwear after a long day of scratching your sweaty ballbag.

I was loading the washing machine this morning and sneezed from all the swamp dust flying off my dirty boxers.

by Rev. Johnny Blumpkin August 29, 2019

p'skeezle skazzel

A phrase invented by accident one day because my friends called me predictable, so I just uttered the first nonsense that came to mind. It is both a greeting, an expression of excitement and a phrase to shout in celebration.

(knock on door)

My friend "come in"
(door opens)
Me: p'skeezle skazzel
My friend: what?
Me: who's predictable now bitch?

by Rev. Johnny Blumpkin May 05, 2018

Post-Coital Piss

That first piss you take after having sex, that feels extra good compared to a regular piss. As you're bladder empties the last bit of left over climax pleasure leaves your perineum aching with delight as the joy finished draining out of your dick. Also, abbreviated as P-CP

Guy 1: Hey, I heard you moaning in the bathroom when you went to take a piss, what's up with that?
Guy 2: Yeah I had just got done taking the wife to pound town before you got here and didn't take time to piss before the game started.
Guy 1: Um... Ok... So, why the moaning?
Guy 2: P-CP.
Guy 1: P-CP?
Guy 2: Post-Coital Piss, it felt incredible, even made my taint quiver.
Guy 1: Matthews just scored on a 1-timer
Guy 2: Go Leafs...

by Rev. Johnny Blumpkin May 17, 2018

cocoa snake

Any turd that is at least 8 inches in length.

This morning I woke up and took a shit, dropped a massive cocoa snake in the bowl.

by Rev. Johnny Blumpkin January 31, 2018

Zedite

A slur for Gen Z members, who much like the demonic spirits from the Evil Dead franchise, spew vitriol and negativity and will "swallow your soul" by forcing you to believe what they do, OR ELSE; they clearly want to take over the world. They are known for being judgmental, irritable, socially maladapted and staring into device screens like a zombie.

Gen X Dad: I accidentally talked about how great life was in the 90's around my daughters college friends and they all went berserk and began screaming at me like demons.

Friend: Kinda like those possessed people in Evil Dead?

Gen X Dad: Yeah like deadite's, except Gen Z'ers... so "Zedite's"

by Rev. Johnny Blumpkin December 05, 2023