10 definitions by Redhawk23

A rapidly growing Suburb of St. Louis that at first seems like the perfect place to live on the surface. But truly it is the most artificial Yuppie infested place in the entierty of the mid west. The houses are little more than over expensive cubes of plastic siding, and the schools are more like asylums for the culturly ill.
Paying tribute to it's mostly German heritage Columbia has instated a self importan squad of gestapo like Police, who for some reason can do anything they want with out a warrent. And instead of stopping what actual crimes do go on in this town they spend their time harassing loiterers and skateboarders, or pretty much anyone under 25.
This town is supposed to be a safe, spottless community but people drive like the have their heads completly up there own ass due to having cell phones surgically attached to their heads. Also there are many accounts of child molesters and the like and recently a youth minister ath the local Baptist church was charged with making child porn at a church run summer camp.
Everything here is subdivisions with fake lawns and perfect roads exept for a small chunk of crap on the sothern edge of town that the city officials have apearantly have forgotten and pay no attention to and have since let to deteriorate with out any attempt to fix streets.
There are almost no successful businesses in Columbia exept a dominos and an infinite amount of Real Estate agencies that exist to populate the endless rows of siding cubes. There is no sense of community of in Columbia. Everyone is either too stuck up or distrusting to talk or say hi and busily rush on past you on the sidewalks, or try to run you over in their escalades (no joke). The worst thing about columbia is that they are constantly pwned by neighboring Waterloo.
You know all those bottles you always recycle? They aren't used to make sweaters and sleeping bags, they get melted down into Columbia Houses.

After WW II Gestapo officers, fearing for their lives, moved to Columbia, Illinois and became police officers.
by Redhawk23 March 18, 2007
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wasting time with others. The dirtiest term for hanging out.
I like to fanticize about mutual procrastination, you know getting some friends together sitting in a circle and watching tv for two hours instead of homework, yeah thats the stuff.
by Redhawk23 February 3, 2011
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Lone survivor of a secret government project, Known as Project Neptune, Signed off on by Reagan, to create a squad of supermen to manually sabatage Soviet submarines. After the fall of the USSR and the end of the cold war, Phelps was reassigned to total Olympic Domination
Holy crap how many medals does that guy have

Michael Phelps=Abe Sapien
by Redhawk23 August 18, 2008
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