Da infamous Scottish pirate-leader who made his fortune by setting fire to conquered ships and then extorting them for huge sums to bribe him to extinguish da flames.
I dunno if those puny wine-bottle-sized fire-extinguishers would be all dat effective on huge clippers or schooners dat were engulfed in flames --- Captain Kidde might have had to switch to da larger "Adultte" brand of extinguisher to properly put out said towering infernos.
by QuacksO0 May 30, 2025
Get the Captain Kidde mug.Folks who are covered in tattoos may view themselves as being "better than the average bare", but if a fellow human is gonna "drop it all for me", I would much prefer just a "pian 'n' natural look" in the skin-department.
by QuacksO0 June 21, 2025
Get the better than the average bare mug.How you'll feel if either you get interacted with less than respectfully/seriously or da pub will only serve you a non-alcoholic drink.
20-year-old: I got totally sassparated when da bartender both eye-rollingly rejected da fake-ID card I'd shown him and then poured me a glass of root beer instead of da shot of whiskey I'd asked for.
by QuacksO0 June 08, 2025
Get the sassparated mug.If yer favorite primitive-hominid buddy wants to train for joining da local fire department, it might be wise to start him off wif a GEICO fire extinguisher --- no fussy pins, levers, or nozzles to learn about; he would merely need to hit it wif his club to make it operate.
by QuacksO0 May 30, 2025
Get the GEICO fire extinguisher mug.Da line of fire extinguishers dat are so simple to operate, even a primitive primate could use them.
Prehistoric man cooked over an open fire, so a Cavemanne brand conflagration-dowser would have been handy to have around "just in case".
by QuacksO0 May 30, 2025
Get the Cavemanne brand mug.Da residential avenue where conditions are even more simple/pleasant than da standard "non-arduous living" lane.
Sweet little old lady: I love my locale on a quiet peaceful cul-de-sac, but da pavement was getting a little bumpy for me to use my electric mobility-scooter, so da local highway-department manager arranged to have da road re-surfaced with fresh smooth asphalt, and so now it's totally "Easier Street" for me to tootle along down to da corner diner to have a cup of hot coffee and read da morning paper.
by QuacksO0 May 26, 2025
Get the Easier Street mug.How you politely request an Italian to make room for your foam drink-cooler on da table next to his own utensils.
American guest: This table looks fairly small and crowded --- I hesitate to ask anyone to shift his silverware around to accommodate my insulated lemonade-glass.
Italian host: Oh, don't worry about that --- just take any empty seat and quietly say "skoozie" to your seating-neighbor; he'll move aside for you.
Italian host: Oh, don't worry about that --- just take any empty seat and quietly say "skoozie" to your seating-neighbor; he'll move aside for you.
by QuacksO0 May 27, 2025
Get the skoozie mug.