QuacksO's definitions

driplomat

Someone whom you send to politely tell a building-owner dat he has a leak somewhere.

In da famous "boy with his finger in da dike" tale, said heroic youth would gladly have been a driplomat and run to courteously inform da townspeople dat da ocean-water was starting to leak through da wall, but he was afraid dat if da water was allowed to keep flowing through da eroded channel in da porous berm, said chink would grow too big and cause a disastrous flood before da villagers could get back to make repairs.

by QuacksO November 8, 2022

lootenant

An egotistical jerk who claims to be of somewhat "elevated" military rank, but who in reality is merely a no-account civilian who stays in the bathroom for extended periods of time.

Anyone who has reached the "pooping rank" of Lootenant Commander should either drastically alter his diet or seek medical help from a licensed gastroenterologist!

by QuacksO February 8, 2019

periodic profile-purging

A boring-but-necessary bit of drudgery that must be performed every so often on your Facebook and other online "this is me and my life" pages, to ferret out and delete any derogatory/offensive/useless content that a few lazy-a** hoodlums with excessively-temperish personalities (and an unwillingness to merely talk to you directly/privately if they have a gripe with you about something, instead of just splashing their whimpery B.S. all over your profile's comments-section) and/or way too much time on their hands have posted there, so that other viewers of your profiles will not get any wrong ideas about you (i.e., incorrectly think that whatever is being complained about regarding you is actually valid, invalidly assume that you approve of and/or welcome less-than-decent-or-positive material, etc.).

I have to laboriously perform a periodic profile-purging for my Facebook and Tagged account-pages every few months, but I find it worthwhile, since most people whom I befriend online tell me that they like what they see in my profiles, and no doubt this is largely because I try to keep them "clean and pristine" so that viewers are not offended as they scroll down the pages.

by QuacksO December 2, 2018

chocolate-milk alternative

Refers to a "just as bad or worse" substitution-product/activity employed to supposedly "fill the void" created by a discontinued unhealthy habit --- the idea here is that while the milk itself may indeed be low-fat, the added calorie-rich and sugary-sweet chocolate has far more fattening ingredients than just the cream in full-fat milk could possibly have contained, and so the person will likely gain even more weight than ever.

Three classic --- and very tragic --- examples of a "chocolate-milk alternative" would be a substance-abuse recovery-program's giving a dry-drunk lots of high-sugar foods in place of alcohol, someone's switching to compulsive shopping in place of gambling, or a person's becoming harshly-snappy and irritably-demanding after giving up cigarettes.

by QuacksO November 5, 2018

even a baby could do it

Yeah, sure --- if the baby in question was Einstein or Hulk Hogan before he grew up.

Often when an adult snortingly grumbles that, "Even a baby could do it!" when a child either doesn't understand instructions or is too timid/weak to perform some action, the truth is that the grownup is **himself** not able to explain or carry out the task, either, and so he is merely trying to make himself feel better by verbally putting down the poor innocent child. Pathetic.

by QuacksO July 23, 2019

"music on hold"-grade tune

Refers to a somewhat-"tame"/boring and/or repetitive musical composition that is "okay", but definitely nothing special or "memorable" --- it would merely be something that you might wanna half-listen to while waiting for someone to pick up/get back to you on the phone, be serenaded with over a store's PA system while shopping, or have for soothing your impatience when riding a slow elevator.

The NYC Greyhound station plays light-classical music over the ceiling-speakers to help its patrons to while away the long boring hours during bus-layovers; I appreciate it that they don't simply toss "music on hold"-grade tunes at you for extended periods.

by QuacksO March 25, 2019

complyance

Obedience of a law regarding multi-layer materials-sandwiching.

I've seen various thicknesses of CDX with sizeable air-gaps dat extend clear through da panel from edge to edge; I seriously wonder if said "porous" lumber is truly in complyance wif manufacturing regulations.

by QuacksO June 16, 2023