Definitions by Pete Dick
Cost Per Lay
Cook: "Hey, are you still dating that high maintenace bitch?"
Pete: "Yeah, she is killing me."
Cook: "Why, she's pretty hot?"
Pete: "Yeah she is but I have to take her out on expensive dates or she won't give me any."
Cook: "What's your Cost Per Lay?"
Pete: "Fuck, I dunno, at least a hundred bucks."
Cook (laughing): "Dude, your so fucked, dump that bitch!"
Pete: "Not before I tape myself nailing her."
Cook: "That'll be some expensive porn my good man..."
Pete: "Yeah, she is killing me."
Cook: "Why, she's pretty hot?"
Pete: "Yeah she is but I have to take her out on expensive dates or she won't give me any."
Cook: "What's your Cost Per Lay?"
Pete: "Fuck, I dunno, at least a hundred bucks."
Cook (laughing): "Dude, your so fucked, dump that bitch!"
Pete: "Not before I tape myself nailing her."
Cook: "That'll be some expensive porn my good man..."
Cost Per Lay by Pete Dick February 10, 2008
HIVey
how one feels the day after having drunk, unprotected sex. The anxiety of not knowing if you contracted an STD along with the withdrawl symptoms of a hangover combine to form this unsettling feeling.
TP: "Dude, did you bang that girl from the bar last night?"
Pete: "aaahhh, yeah, kinda"
TP: "Dude, you totally didn't wear a rubber did you?"
Pete: "aaahhh, yeah, kinda not"
TP: "Dude, are you feeling HIVey?"
Pete: "aaahhh, yeah, kinda"
TP: "Idiot"
Pete: "aaahhh, yeah, kinda"
Pete: "aaahhh, yeah, kinda"
TP: "Dude, you totally didn't wear a rubber did you?"
Pete: "aaahhh, yeah, kinda not"
TP: "Dude, are you feeling HIVey?"
Pete: "aaahhh, yeah, kinda"
TP: "Idiot"
Pete: "aaahhh, yeah, kinda"
cock in the cash register
When the owner of an establishment, usually a restaurant or bar, uses/abuses their position as owner and has sex with their employees or customers.
Jeff: "Who's that dude molesting the bartender?"
Pete: "That's Greg, the owner of the hotel."
Jeff: "What, that fucker, shit he has his cock in the cash register."
Pete: "Damn right dude, you gotta be careful with that shit, some bitch is gonna come along and scream sexual harrasment and slam that register door right on his pecker."
Jeff: "No shit, that is going to hurt his johnson and his wallet."
Pete: "True dat."
Pete: "That's Greg, the owner of the hotel."
Jeff: "What, that fucker, shit he has his cock in the cash register."
Pete: "Damn right dude, you gotta be careful with that shit, some bitch is gonna come along and scream sexual harrasment and slam that register door right on his pecker."
Jeff: "No shit, that is going to hurt his johnson and his wallet."
Pete: "True dat."
cock in the cash register by Pete Dick January 19, 2008
royster
Pete: "Hey what you doing this weekend?"
Cook: "Man are you a fool? I am going to royster with the oyster dude, it is the biggest party of the year!"
Pete: "Damn, I gotta stop living in a hole, I can't believe I forgot again..."
Cook: "Man are you a fool? I am going to royster with the oyster dude, it is the biggest party of the year!"
Pete: "Damn, I gotta stop living in a hole, I can't believe I forgot again..."
Pumkin Head Deluxe
Also Known As a PhD, a Pumkin Head Deluxe is an extreme beatdown of the head in particular in return a violation against your social group. The Pumkin Head Delux is used to keep disipline within the ranks.
Pete: "Did you hear what Freddie did to my sister?"
Jeff: "No, what did that ass hole do now?"
Pete: "He was suppossed to pick her up from the bar and drop her off at her house when she was all drunk. Instead he took her back to his house and fucked her while she was passed out."
Jeff: "Dude, that is fucked up, you need to give him a some education, maybe a PhD."
Pete: "You mean a Pumkin Head Deluxe? Damn, lets take a baseball bat to his mug."
Jeff: "Word..."
Jeff: "No, what did that ass hole do now?"
Pete: "He was suppossed to pick her up from the bar and drop her off at her house when she was all drunk. Instead he took her back to his house and fucked her while she was passed out."
Jeff: "Dude, that is fucked up, you need to give him a some education, maybe a PhD."
Pete: "You mean a Pumkin Head Deluxe? Damn, lets take a baseball bat to his mug."
Jeff: "Word..."
Pumkin Head Deluxe by Pete Dick January 12, 2008
Irish Yourself
to consume large quantities of alcohol with your friends in a short period of time in order to catch up with their drunkedness.
Irish Yourself by Pete Dick January 11, 2008
poop shuffle
I went out for a run the other day, and a couple miles from home my intestines felt like they were going to burst. I had to do the poop shuffle the whole way home--I barely made it.
poop shuffle by Pete Dick January 10, 2008