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Olshan's definitions

lifeguard

The best job you could ever have. Its a wonderful job where you get to work outside, meet new people everyday, and gain valuable experience for later in life. Many people think that guards just sit around and work on their tans. Yes, that is true to some extent, but there is a lot more to lifeguarding than most people think. Guards have to clean the pool/bathrooms/surrounding areas, check chemicals, balance chemicals, write incident reports, perform pump/filter maintenance, clean skimmer baskets, etc.

Managers have even more duties. They must do the scheduling for one or more facilities, make sure that the guards actually show up to work, and in general make sure that everyone is doing their job and that everything is running smoothly. And managers get paid pretty well.
17 year old Manager: I love being a lifeguard. I just got a $1700 paycheck for two weeks of work. I think I'll go shopping after I finish this week's schedule and fire someone.
by Olshan December 15, 2007
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jeep srt8

The Jeep SRT8 is the high performance variant of the Jeep Grand Cherokee. Available for purchase since 2006, the SRT8 features a 6.1L Hemi V8 which produces 420 horsepower. With a 0-60 time of just 4.6 seconds, it has phenomenal performance which is at odds with it high weight and SUV status.

For comparison, here are several other 0-60 times:
Porsche Carrera S: 4.6
Porsche Cayenne Turbo: 4.9
Lexus IS350: 5.3
Chevrolet Corvette: 4.3

The SRT8 is priced quite well. Pricing for 2008 models starts at around 41k and ends in the high 40s for a fully loaded model. Thus, the SRT8 is a excellent blend of performance, prestige, practicality, and cost.
Jeep SRT8 passenger: "Dude, you just smoked that Cayenne Turbo! Doesn't a well equipped one of those cost around 100k?"

Jeep SRT8 owner: "Yep."
by Olshan January 12, 2008
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pitbull

A must have accessory for anyone living in a trailer.
"Shit main, Imma get me one a those mean ass pitbulls so it can fuck people up"
by Olshan October 18, 2008
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