627 definitions by Nick D
Dead.
Comes from the "Weekend at Bernie's" movies where a couple of idiots drag their dead boss all over the place and convince people that he's alive.
Comes from the "Weekend at Bernie's" movies where a couple of idiots drag their dead boss all over the place and convince people that he's alive.
"Oh yeah! This party is off the chain!"
"Shut up bitch. It's bernie, and I'm gonna be swayze."
"So how was Ermelinda in the sack last night?"
"Bernie, man. Like a cold, bernie fish."
"So I hear Grandpa Fred's been circling the drain lately. Did he buy the farm yet?"
"Hell yeah dogg, he's bernie. Cancer."
"Shut up bitch. It's bernie, and I'm gonna be swayze."
"So how was Ermelinda in the sack last night?"
"Bernie, man. Like a cold, bernie fish."
"So I hear Grandpa Fred's been circling the drain lately. Did he buy the farm yet?"
"Hell yeah dogg, he's bernie. Cancer."
by Nick D October 27, 2003
"Now we can handle this like gentlemen or we can get into some gangsta shit..." -Snoop Dogg
If you really think about it, the Civil War was nothing more than some gangsta shit. A lot of gangsta shit.
If you really think about it, the Civil War was nothing more than some gangsta shit. A lot of gangsta shit.
by Nick D September 16, 2003
A figurative expression meaning being a complete failure at life, a drain on society. Originates from the SNL skit featuring Chris Farley as Matt Foley, motivational speaker.
"You kids are probably saying to yourself, "Now, I'm gonna go out, and I'm gonna get the world by the tail and wrap it around and put it in my pocket!" Well, I'm here to tell you that you're probably gonna find out, as you go out there, that you're not gonna amount to jack squat!" You're gonna end up eating a steady diet of government cheese and living in a van down by the river!" -Matt Foley
Dad: "You made it, son! Congratulations on graduating from Harvard Summa Cum Laude and getting that great job at Goldman Sachs, the world's #1 investment bank."
Son: "Thanks, dad. But actually I only got Magna Cum Laude and will be working at Morgan Stanley, the #2 investment bank in the world."
Dad: "WHAAAAAAT?!?! How have I raised such a worthless, good-for-nothing slacker? You couldn't even finish in the top 10% of your Harvard class with your 3 point..."
Son: "3.76."
Dad: "3.76? A monkey with down syndrome could get a better GPA than that! You miserable failure!"
Son: "Dad, seriously, I worked really hard!"
Dad: "I bet you did! I bet you worked your ass off playing beer pong and chasing the coeds! Well sonny, you're going to have plenty of time to drink beer and chase trashy women when you're LIVING IN A VAN DOWN BY THE RIVER!!!"
Dad: "You made it, son! Congratulations on graduating from Harvard Summa Cum Laude and getting that great job at Goldman Sachs, the world's #1 investment bank."
Son: "Thanks, dad. But actually I only got Magna Cum Laude and will be working at Morgan Stanley, the #2 investment bank in the world."
Dad: "WHAAAAAAT?!?! How have I raised such a worthless, good-for-nothing slacker? You couldn't even finish in the top 10% of your Harvard class with your 3 point..."
Son: "3.76."
Dad: "3.76? A monkey with down syndrome could get a better GPA than that! You miserable failure!"
Son: "Dad, seriously, I worked really hard!"
Dad: "I bet you did! I bet you worked your ass off playing beer pong and chasing the coeds! Well sonny, you're going to have plenty of time to drink beer and chase trashy women when you're LIVING IN A VAN DOWN BY THE RIVER!!!"
by Nick D June 21, 2006
A serious fall in which you land on your face. It's called a "face plant" because it appears as if you're trying to do an impression of a plant with your face as its roots.
Last night at Sigma Chi I was so wasted that I slipped, bounced off the ramp, and did a serious face-plant onto the ground below.
by Nick D May 24, 2004
"YES!!! I won the D.A.R.E. award and got a free T-shirt."
"Whatever you little fucking narc, give it 5 years and you'll be as doped out as any of us."
"Whatever you little fucking narc, give it 5 years and you'll be as doped out as any of us."
by Nick D February 24, 2003
Neil: "Yo Bob let's hit up the strip club tonight, I hear they have 2-for-1 lapdances."
Bob: "No...uh...I can't. My...uh...girlfriend and me are gonna have a threesome with this hot-ass chick, dude, it's gonna be awesome."
Neil: "Shut up. Everyone knows the wife wouldn't let you do that." (whip cracks)
Bob: "Yeah...we're actually...uh...knitting."
Bob: "No...uh...I can't. My...uh...girlfriend and me are gonna have a threesome with this hot-ass chick, dude, it's gonna be awesome."
Neil: "Shut up. Everyone knows the wife wouldn't let you do that." (whip cracks)
Bob: "Yeah...we're actually...uh...knitting."
by Nick D February 26, 2004
A talentless, cookie-cutter product of the music industry that has changed form over the years, but right now in 2004 generally consists of:
1) A Jamaican-sounding guy singing in broken English and making little if any sense
2) Any girl with a half-decent voice, usually singing about dancing in the club or something equally overused and pointless
Apparently some people in America actually like this kind of music and have the impressive self-restraint to avoid changing the station when such a group is on the radio. I have yet to meet such a person, but I'd guess that middle schools all over the country are full of them.
1) A Jamaican-sounding guy singing in broken English and making little if any sense
2) Any girl with a half-decent voice, usually singing about dancing in the club or something equally overused and pointless
Apparently some people in America actually like this kind of music and have the impressive self-restraint to avoid changing the station when such a group is on the radio. I have yet to meet such a person, but I'd guess that middle schools all over the country are full of them.
See Sean Paul featuring whoever, Black-Eyed Peas, Shaggy featuring whoever, or any of the 200 other no-name spinoffs.
Typical song:
Jamaican guy:
"Shake yo booty mama
Shake shake yo booty
I like to see you shake it
Shake yo booty shake it"
Girl:
"I'm in the club dancing on a Friday night
I'm hangin with my peeps and I feel all right"
And so on...
The above song would probably crack the top 10 on the pop charts if I were to expand the lyrics and produce it. Sad, isn't it?
Typical song:
Jamaican guy:
"Shake yo booty mama
Shake shake yo booty
I like to see you shake it
Shake yo booty shake it"
Girl:
"I'm in the club dancing on a Friday night
I'm hangin with my peeps and I feel all right"
And so on...
The above song would probably crack the top 10 on the pop charts if I were to expand the lyrics and produce it. Sad, isn't it?
by Nick D August 16, 2004