Name removed by the NSA's definitions
Ewoks are teddy-bear like creatures from Star Wars that live on the planet Endor.
But do not be fooled by their cuteness. These badass little motherfuckers will fuck you up. And just when you think they're done fucking you up, they'll fuck you up again.
There is a reason why you don't see any other animals on Endor; because the Ewoks fucking killed them all. And the ones that they didn't kill are too scared of getting their fucking skins ripped off to show themselves. Nothing on Endor breathes without the Ewoks' permission. Once, they found a Jedi, and they tried to COOK HIM. Then, they encountered an entire legion of the Empire's best troops, and they kicked their asses using nothing but rocks, logs, and a few catapults.
Never mess with an Ewok. They will kill you, and play drums with your FUCKING SKULL. At least, if one of 'em doesn't decide to use it as a HAT.
But do not be fooled by their cuteness. These badass little motherfuckers will fuck you up. And just when you think they're done fucking you up, they'll fuck you up again.
There is a reason why you don't see any other animals on Endor; because the Ewoks fucking killed them all. And the ones that they didn't kill are too scared of getting their fucking skins ripped off to show themselves. Nothing on Endor breathes without the Ewoks' permission. Once, they found a Jedi, and they tried to COOK HIM. Then, they encountered an entire legion of the Empire's best troops, and they kicked their asses using nothing but rocks, logs, and a few catapults.
Never mess with an Ewok. They will kill you, and play drums with your FUCKING SKULL. At least, if one of 'em doesn't decide to use it as a HAT.
by Name removed by the NSA January 3, 2014
Get the Ewoksmug. by Name removed by the NSA November 15, 2013
Get the Firecrackermug. by Name removed by the NSA January 3, 2014
Get the The NSAmug. by Name removed by the NSA December 19, 2013
Get the everyone on the internetmug. A vast network of data that is
40% pornography
30% cat pictures
19% creeps
10% advertisements
10% the word "gay"
1% relevant information
All of which is spied on by the NSA
40% pornography
30% cat pictures
19% creeps
10% advertisements
10% the word "gay"
1% relevant information
All of which is spied on by the NSA
People keep saying that we should go back to the "Glory days" of the 1950's. But we can't; now we have the internet.
by Name removed by the NSA November 15, 2013
Get the Internetmug. 
A badass, classic monster. It resembles a human, except for it's long, sharp fangs, and unusually pale skin. It lives on blood, sucking it from it's victims by biting them, usually on the neck. Similar to a zombie, the victim either dies, or turns into a vampire.
A vampire sleeps in a coffin during the day, as it will burn in the daylight. It is also often associated with bats.
Not to be confused with a sparkling little fucking FAIRY that stalks girls in high school 1/8 their age.
A vampire sleeps in a coffin during the day, as it will burn in the daylight. It is also often associated with bats.
Not to be confused with a sparkling little fucking FAIRY that stalks girls in high school 1/8 their age.
Girl: OMGG EDWARD IS SOOOOO HAWT!!!!1!!ONE1!!!!!
Boy: Please die..
This is an example of how the Vampire has been tainted forever.
Boy: Please die..
This is an example of how the Vampire has been tainted forever.
by Name removed by the NSA December 13, 2013
Get the Vampiremug.