Definitions by Mr Spanky Pants

Emergency Pants 

A pair of loose-fitting trousers, typically with a draw-string and brown in colour. Usually used before or immediately after a big meal to allow for bloating, or to avoid damage to your other clothes during a case of the squits.

The pizza was of Roman proportions, but luckily I was wearing my emergency pants

I was so ill I shat myself, thank goodness for my emergency pants!

Emergency Pants by Mr Spanky Pants August 7, 2006

Roman 

Replusively large or loud.

Your penis is positively Roman!

The Roman empire was very Roman.

Roman by Mr Spanky Pants August 7, 2006

Release the Kracken 

To defacate, usually urgently or in desparation.

Derived from the Kracken of ancient Greek legend - a huge sea monster which resembled a floater.

Holy fuck, I really need to release the Kracken.

Hey Man, I wouldn't go in there for a while - I've just released the Kracken.

Release the Kracken by Mr Spanky Pants August 7, 2006

Gumpter 

A fool or madman. Usually used to highlight extreme cases of lunacy and/or stupidity.

Look at that Gumpter eating his own shoes! Hey, Gumpter, put the fucking shoes down!

Gumpter by Mr Spanky Pants August 7, 2006

Mercan 

Derogatory term for a citizen of the United States of America. Sometimes spelled merkan.

Look at the size of that mercan! He must've eaten his children for breakfast!

Mercans' ignorance makes me cringe.

Mercan by Mr Spanky Pants August 7, 2006

Merkan 

Derogatory term for a citizen of the United States of America. Sometimes spelled mercan.

Merkans make me sick to my stomach!

Your average merkan is about as intelligent as a brick.

Merkan by Mr Spanky Pants August 7, 2006

Papercut 

Euphemism for a very small vaginal opening.

The size of Nigel's member was clearly causing her papercut to tear.

Papercut by Mr Spanky Pants August 7, 2006