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Monkey's Dad's definitions

Remembership Drive

The futile urge to recall the "toll-free" number - is there another kind anymore? - which the announcers manning the membership drive on Public Radio have repeated several dozen times in the past few seconds and which, as a result, refuses to be recalled.
Let's see... 888... something something... why do I have such low remembership drive for that number, even though it is toll-free?
by Monkey's Dad September 11, 2019
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pundemic

A highly infectious contagion in which unfortunate word games spread from one victim to another until the entire nearby population is groaning in pain.
Jack suddenly shouted, "Can February March? No, but April May", laughing uproarious at his own stellar wit. Stan replied, "Need an ark to save two of every animal? I noah guy" smirking at his one-upsmanship, neither hearing the quiet groaning coming from each side of the table - a tragic symptom of the viral pundemic. It was irreversible. Sue chimed in, "Becoming a vegetarian is one big missed steak."
by Monkey's Dad June 8, 2021
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coronawalrus

A thick-skinned survivor who, having seen it all, feels immune.
He had been a war orphan, a soldier, a refugee, a patient given no chance of survival, a coronawalrus without fear, volunteering to help others.
by Monkey's Dad March 24, 2020
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9 minutes of silence

Observed by many, across America, to honor the life of George Floyd, murdered by asphyxiation.
In the sunlight of a spring afternoon, they stood together, side by side, and held a vigil - 9 minutes of silence - the time that George Floyd was pinned to the street and asphyxiated by the kneeling weight of a Minneapolis cop.
by Monkey's Dad June 2, 2020
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2020WTF

A vanity license plate, issued in Maine.
She stared numbly through the rain coursing down her windshield, wondering if she were dreaming. There it really was, on the car in front of her, the truth of her life this year, the truth of everyone's life. 2020WTF.
by Monkey's Dad December 7, 2020
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vaccutemporal

An experience of life without time. The absence of a temporal dimension. An extension of simultemporal experience, in which past, present and future are equidistant and simultaneous.
Having grown accustomed to simultemporal experience - living time all at once, rather than sequentially - he was increasingly forced to acknowledge states which were vaccutemporal, wherein the sense of time in any form dissolved.
by Monkey's Dad August 7, 2021
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appearances matter

A wistful notion from the recent-yet-distant time when people saw each other.
Glancing into her closet, filled with lovingly-chosen clothing she no longer wore, slipping on her plastic coat, her mask and rubber gloves to go 'shopping', she recalled what her mother had taught her when she was young, that appearances matter, and wondered when it would be true again.
by Monkey's Dad May 14, 2020
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