Monkey's Dad's definitions
Empty streets, silent cities, people under legal edict to avoid others, with no sound more ominous than a simple cough, the world swiftly felt Coughkaesque.
by Monkey's Dad April 2, 2020
Get the Coughkaesque mug.She looked innocent, her blue eyes wide, and he never saw it coming, another taste of her criminally negligent humor. Sliding from the bed and falling to the floor, he begged, "Don't make me laugh! Please!" It was too late.
by Monkey's Dad March 26, 2023
Get the criminally negligent humor mug.She would refuse to wear a mask, spit in the face of the cashier, open the ice cream carton and lick the contents before putting it back, urinate in all the lemonade bottles, carry her gun where'n'when-the-hell she chose, drive 200 miles an hour through the red lights while schoolkids were crossing, and use the salt shaker on your table for target practice, because this is a free country.
by Monkey's Dad May 25, 2020
Get the a free country mug.A sexual deviant who derives pleasure from exposing his or her nostrils in public, wearing a mask over their mouth but under their nose.
As with other bodily orifices, it is presently taboo to expose one's nostrils in public. So naturally there is a new breed of Nasal Flasher, making eye contact, semi-naked, getting their kicks. They are often confused with the millions of total morons who do not understand that the nose and mouth are connected.
by Monkey's Dad March 28, 2021
Get the Nasal Flasher mug.A person able to move their limbs freely, to walk about their beloved cities, towns, beaches and parks. A person looking forward to same, if and when the coronavirus pandemic ends.
After days of forced isolation in his minuscule New York apartment, able to touch all four walls at once, he yearned to open the door, to hit the street, to walk, to run, to be a free range human.
by Monkey's Dad March 20, 2020
Get the Free Range Human mug.The murmured protestation of a woman being served an artfully prepared late-morning breakfast, in bed, with a monogrammed sterling spoon, under a velvet blanket, by a man whose one goal in life is her pleasure and comfort, meant to convey the disclaimer: "I am not a Jap".
Ianaj - obviously you have never known a real one - please bring me my glasses... turn the fan slightly toward the window... my phone... and what time is it?
by Monkey's Dad September 3, 2019
Get the Ianaj mug.When fifty is the new sixty. When recently healthy and vital people, so exhausted and worn down from Covid, from politics, from the craziness of masks, vaccines, the Big Lie, feel they have lost not just a year but a decade.
Yesterday she was 49. Today was - big whoop - her birthday, and whatever the balloons spelled out, she was sure she must be turning Sifty.
by Monkey's Dad September 16, 2021
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