Monkey's Dad's definitions
The delusional gesture of separating the hands, bringing them together again, manipulating yarn, which Donald Trump continually plays while speaking. A game beloved of little girls everywhere.
by Monkey's Dad October 23, 2020
Get the cat's cradle mug."Person. Woman. Man. Camera. TV. Would you like me to repeat the words in random, alphabetical or reverse order? I'll take the aggregate letters of those words and arrange them into a palindrome, after translating them into Chinese, a language I speak better than Xi Ping Jong by the way. Dementia! I'm more fully mented than any man, woman, camera, tv or person on the planet, twice my age, particularly that deranged loser... the Dementiacratic candidate... his name'll come to me...
by Monkey's Dad October 23, 2020
Get the mented mug.Doctor Dolittle's more eccentric office-mate. A person so fully connected to the animals that he finds humans strangely exotic.
"Where's Doctor Donothing?"
"Outside, where he's been since four AM, feeding the deer, the squirrels and chipmunks, the birds and the dogs. When I try to talk to him, he looks at me like I belong in an aquarium."
"Outside, where he's been since four AM, feeding the deer, the squirrels and chipmunks, the birds and the dogs. When I try to talk to him, he looks at me like I belong in an aquarium."
by Monkey's Dad October 24, 2020
Get the Doctor Donothing mug."Ok", she began, "so he like, asked me out, but I mean, when I like, asked if he was like, into "Cheer" he dropped Ted Danson, Kirstie Alley and, like, Shelley Long and I mean like, whose great-grandparents are they??? So I gotta do some online carbon dating first."
by Monkey's Dad October 26, 2020
Get the online carbon dating mug.She awoke on November 1, 2020, eight months into Covid world, four years in the Trumpian alternative universe, and found herself trying to name the daze of the week, wondering how many of them until November 3, 2020, when something or nothing might change, maybe a few months or hours, who could say, and was reminded that she was back on Standard Time. It sounded so nice. She was sure it used to mean something...
by Monkey's Dad November 1, 2020
Get the Standard Time mug.A system of government in which a politician's focus is directed toward one's opponents - "Them" - and not to their constituents.
Both parties devoted all of their time, energy and money to bringing each other down. Imagine if they spent it trying to make life better for those they were elected to 'represent'. We would have an actual Democracy, not the Themocracy we now suffer under.
by Monkey's Dad November 5, 2020
Get the Themocracy mug.The deep American exhalation, after too long a period in which I can't breathe was true for too many, for so many reasons.
by Monkey's Dad November 7, 2020
Get the We can breathe mug.