Monkey's Dad's definitions
A state of fatigue so terminal that you cannot roll another foot, having all the shapely utility, bounce and style of a flat tire, the air completely taken out of you.
Another day, after another sleepless night, feeling so deflated that no air hose, pressure gauge or patch could address his flat tire-dness. Yet he'd get through it, for sure, he'd do everything needed of him, as he's done yesterday, and the day before, and the... day...... before........... huh?! Me?? Yeah, no, I'm awake! Just turn the key, give it a little gas... sure, let's go.
by Monkey's Dad September 13, 2023
Get the flat tire-dness mug.In an act of emergination, she saw herself, and everyone in the country, opening their doors and bursting into the sunlight, hugging each other, throwing their masks in the air, breathing deeply and freely. She could dream.
by Monkey's Dad May 1, 2020
Get the emergination mug.Those who understand that the phrase "Please wear a mask" does not mean: 1) carry it in your hand, 2) wear it around your neck or 3) wear it covering your chin but not your mouth and nose.
YOU! Yes, you, coming within inches of me, breathing in my face, with YOUR MASK SECURED AROUND YOUR ELBOW!, please respect my right to live even if you don't care about your own, because Smart Lives Matter.
by Monkey's Dad September 13, 2020
Get the Smart Lives Matter mug.Having blown their cash on a then-state-of-the-art sound system for the band truck, the guys only had enough to buy one tape. For the last five decades, Martha and the Vandellas had been singing endlessly in his head - "It's like a heatwave, burnin' in my hea-a-art, can't keep from a-cry-in', tearin' me apa-a-art", his personal 8 track tapeworm.
by Monkey's Dad March 8, 2020
Get the 8 track tapeworm mug.by Monkey's Dad March 31, 2020
Get the teaching your dog to drive mug.A sweeping, fast moving state of anxiety that arrives without warning and takes everything in its path with it.
He had made an offhand remark, a minor joke, but to her it incited an anxiety-tornado, swirling, uprooting, splintering and lifting her sense of security with it until she felt herself to be an emotionally wrecked trailer park. And like a tornado, it passed and calm was once again restored.
by Monkey's Dad August 15, 2021
Get the Anxiety-Tornado mug.A secret project in development at the Walt Disney studio in the fall of 1956, following their massively successful Davy Crockett series. Drawn by animator Ward Kimball, sketches show Jiminy Cricket, featured in the 1940 film Pinocchio, in an oversized and skewed coonskin hat instead of his top hat, wearing a buckskin jacket and carrying a rifle in place of his umbrella.
Jiminy Crockett, Prince of the Wild Frontier, was a concept that refused to hop off the drawing board.
by Monkey's Dad September 29, 2023
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