Bewilderness

An emotional space in which you become hopelessly tangled, unable to see the trees, blind to the forest, wandering in circles, lost.
How had the relationship gone wrong? Could she have just trashed him? No, she must have meant... something else... because... words are only words, he can't be all of those things she called him... or any of them. After so many good times... and why was it getting dark so fast? He'd find his way out of the Bewilderness, in a day or a year. Maybe.
by Monkey's Dad September 10, 2022
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I'm Your Tuna Fish Sandwich

From the blues classic - slang for sexual availability.

"Free tonight?"
"I'm your tuna fish sandwich."
"I'm your tuna fish sandwich, spoon me on your bread.
I'm your tuna sandwich baby, best to eat in bed."
by Monkey's Dad February 20, 2023
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Scars and Stripes Forever

In 2020, a patriotic march for a wounded nation.

A version of Stars and Stripes Forever, a piece which in show business was historically called "the Disaster March". When theaters and circuses had house bands, this march was a code signaling a life-threatening emergency. Except for impending disaster, circus bands never played the tune under any circumstances
July 4th approaching, feeling America at a moment of life-threatening disaster, he found himself whistling Scars and Stripes Forever, hoping it would not be forever, that our national fortunes would improve.
by Monkey's Dad July 01, 2020
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Walking Food Festival

A person whose life during Covid has come to revolve around food.
Posting photos of every meal and every snack, sharing recipes, looking forward to eating because what else was there to do, she had become a Walking Food Festival.
by Monkey's Dad March 02, 2021
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Malignant narcissism

A corrosive recipe of narcissism, antisocial behavior, paranoia, aggression, and a topping of sadism. Grandiose, hostile, unable to tolerate even the smallest criticism, the malignant narcissist undermines families, organizations and associates, consistently attempting to dehumanize others by applying childish nicknames to diminish them in the eyes of others.
The phrase 'malignant narcissism' reminded him of someone, someone front and center, someone in his face, in everyone's face, all day every day... wait... wait... it would come to him.
by Monkey's Dad April 15, 2020
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cyberoticism

An aura of sexuality conveyed through the Internet. Sexually arousing online communication.
They were both working from home, like everyone, but he looked forward to her joining his Zoom meetings. She was clearly on her bed, not wearing much, and every time she spoke there was a jolt of cyberoticism, which, in isolation, he so deeply craved.
by Monkey's Dad April 04, 2020
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cat's cradle

The delusional gesture of separating the hands, bringing them together again, manipulating yarn, which Donald Trump continually plays while speaking. A game beloved of little girls everywhere.
Debating Biden, Trump revealed his inner life by continually playing cat's cradle.
by Monkey's Dad October 23, 2020
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