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Definitions by Marcoda

sandpaper kisses 

When a kitty kisses you with his or her rough little tongue.
When my cat licks me, it feels like he's giving me sandpaper kisses.
sandpaper kisses by marcoda April 15, 2012

couldn't find his dick in the dark 

Someone who is oblivious, has declining mental facilities, or is simply stupid and cannot recognize obvious things or cannot take on simple tasks.
It's no surprise he gave that gold digger his ATM pin number--he's so dumb he couldn't find his dick in the dark.
Contracting herpes or any STD from a date you meet using an online dating service.
My ex is so stupid. Right after the divorce she got herpes from a dude she met online. She must have used eHerpes.
eHerpes by Marcoda December 9, 2011
The stinky stuff you find in your belly button, more common in innies than outies.
I was digging around in my belly button and pulled out a big wad of gnur.
gnur by Marcoda May 21, 2011

throwupsysex 

When someone throws up during sex because they are drunk.
I was so drunk that I puked all over her. Our sex turned into throwupsysex.
throwupsysex by Marcoda May 6, 2011

regretsysex 

We got drunk and had regretsysex.
regretsysex by Marcoda April 14, 2011