LordJenal's definitions

A Flat Miner

What you get when you drop a piano down a mineshaft.

What do you get when you drop a piano down a Mineshaft?
A♭ Minor!
(A Flat Miner)

by LordJenal May 13, 2022

Eczema

The biggest bitch on the entire planet where you can't stop scratching yourself to death in god knows how many spots in a relentless and long-lasting way and it always comes back! Leaves red bleeding and itchy patches in all sorts of spots. Seriously, sometimes it feels like you want to scratch all your skin off to the point of where your a skeleton, it's that bloody bad!

I hate eczema it's such a bitch!

by LordJenal May 18, 2022

Your shitty makeup is gonna get me fired

If you work as a cashier in a store that sells age restricted items such as alcohol you may get underage girls coming into the store with tonnes of makeup on to make themselves look older. This can result in you not asking them for ID because you think they look old enough to not need it but you end up getting fired anyway because they are actually underage.

For the guys, it is "your shitty beard is gonna get me fired."

Underage girl: *Places bottle of wine on counter*
Cashier: ID please
Underage girl: But I'm 30!
Cashier: Nope, your shitty makeup is gonna get me fired!

by LordJenal December 17, 2023

Vending Machine

The evilest scammer ever. Charges two quid for a bag of Steak McCoys. If you were already having a shit day then a vending machine will make things even worse in the cheekiest fucking way!

I THOUGHT I WAS LOSING MY VIRGINITY TONIGHT AND I FOUND OUT I WASN'T AT THE LAST MOMENT AND TO TOP THINGS OFF THAT FUCKING VENDING MACHINE SCAMMED ME 2 QUID FOR A BAG OF MCCOYS AFTER ALL THAT I'VE BEEN THROUGH THIS EVENING. SO FUCKING ANNOYING!!!! AHHHHH!!!!!!! I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!!!!

by LordJenal June 20, 2022

Scan & Scram

Something that university/college students do in order to get the attendance marks for lectures/tutorials/seminars/lessons that they never attended. They can the attendance scanner outside the room their lesson is in with their student ID, the system marks them as present and they leave and go home or somewhere else other than the lesson. Smart teachers/lecturers will not allow this to happen and will manually change it to absent once they notice the student isn't there.

Scram is an informal word for leave or go away.

Student 1: You can afford to miss another lesson mate.
Student 2: Don't worry. I'll just Scan & Scram, I'll be fine.

by LordJenal October 18, 2022

Lag Lorry

A prisoner transport van. A lag is an informal term for a prisoner in the UK and a lorry is a British term for a truck.

The inmate got taken to court in a lag lorry.

by LordJenal May 19, 2022

Food is coming out of my mouth

An exaggerative term used when a person has eaten large amounts of food and is more than just a bit full but very full and couldn't dare eat anything else.

Idiom; Refers to the exaggeration of when a person is so full that the stomach physically has no space left for the food to go and the food is piling back up the oesophagus and coming back out of the mouth and throat due to no physical place for the food to go. This is not a literal term but rather an exaggeration for being extremely full and unable to eat anything else.

Person 1: Hey, do you want this last piece of cake?
Person 2: No thanks, I've already had a massive pizza already and I'm so full that food is coming out of my mouth. No way can I eat anything else. But thanks anyway.

by LordJenal October 16, 2021