Kofi's definitions

cock whore

woman who is completely addicted to the most prominent male organ. Same as nymph, nympho, nymphomaniac.(Note that "whore" in this context does not usually indicate any payment is made: it simply suggests utter, often gullible submission to the servicing of males, which breeds contempt in others.)

Tray used to be Miss Cock Whore for a few years, but now she's a bit more selective about who can have her.

by kofi May 12, 2003

split beaver

much the same as a bearded clam: except perhaps more eager, and more neatly trimmed, i.e. furry rather than shaggy in its coat. A plain beaver but helplessly spreadeagled. An object of fear, revulsion or contempt for some, an object of desire, conquest or reverence for many: yes it's yet another name for her cunt!

She was 16 when she first discovered she was carrying a wild animal around with her. Before she knew where she was, a wily trapper had trussed up and made short work of her furry little companion. Nowadays she keeps her split beaver as contented, well-exercised and well-fed as she possibly can.

by kofi May 14, 2003

Essex girl

a "common" (or very common) girl, not very bright, both overdressed (in cheap jewellery and tacky fashion) and underdressed (displaying her assets), always materialistic (loves shopping), likes drinking heavily (alcopops will do), and fucks indiscriminately and like a bunny, preferably with guys with a bit of money and claahhhss, but after a few drinks ... well, has to ask her best mate "Who WAS that guy I was with last night, 'Chelle?"

Fred: I heard you scored last night.
Rob: Yeah, just an Essex girl though. What about you?
Fred: Just went home.
Rob: Oh yeah, I forgot Trish is an Essex girl too!

by kofi May 12, 2003

one-night stand

Sexual activity with another person intended for one night only. (Derives from showbiz, a "one-off show". But also of course from the suggestion of a one-off erection, though the term is used by women as well as men as a candid description of "getting your rocks off" when a bit of no-strings fucking etc. was desired.

“I've never had a one-night stand because I've always been afraid that in the cold light of day, she'll wake up and think; "Oh my God! What the hell am I doing in bed with a stupid cunt like this?!”

by kofi May 14, 2003

good time girl

old euphemism, still used for: 1. tart, slut; or 2. sex worker, callgirl, prostitute. A woman who is in search of cheap (if possible, cost- and pain-free) fun, particularly featuring easy and good sex, very interested in the financial generosity of dickheads (a due reward for her looks and personality and class). May either be (see definition 1 above) an "Essex girl" a "Tracy" in her leisure mode, or (def 2) a professional at work. Note: the term is still found used where speakers find it legally safer, more discreet or wittier to view this way of life as "just harmless good clean fun for all concerned"!

Good time girl in the street in Soho, London: "Looking for a good time, govn'r? Well, I cert'nly am!"

by kofi May 14, 2003

shag

can mean rough tobacco, or else amateur beach-style dancing in the US. But in the main UK sense, as noun or verb, is an alternative to "fuck" ... but with a slight, important difference of effect. To some ears, "fuck" (like "bang") can sound like an aggressive act, and/or violent conquest, whereas "shag" (a softer sound) sounds more like an enjoyable fun activity. "Shag" is still often the preferred term among women who are very keen on "shagging", very much enjoy shagging men (and/or women) and getting shagged themselves. But don't so much want to get "fucked" (though if talking about another woman, especially a rival, it may well be a different story!). (Note also: "fucking" can also suggest "meddling" or "cheating", "fucked" is also associated with "broken" or "finished", "had it" - "shagged" is used simply to mean "very tired" .... one more reason for the preference by some people for "shag" over "fuck"!)

Tracy to Sharon at a party: "Don't know about you ge-ww, but I need a good stiff shag right away".
Sharon: Yeah, so do I, but steer clear of that Darren, Trace, he just fucks ge-wws an' leaves 'em on their arses!
Tracy (eyes lighting up): Oh yeah? Which one's him then, Shazz?
Sharon (laughs out loud): Come on ge-ww, surely even YOU can do better than DARREN, ya randy little slag?!!!

by kofi May 14, 2003

I'm all right Jack!

(originally: "Fuck you, Jack, I'm all right!!" - described the bitter dismay of sailors ("jacks") returning home after wartime in the Navy to find themselves not treated as patriots or heroes, but ignored / sneered at by a selfish, complacent, get-ahead society - phrase was subsequently toned down for acceptable general use.)
Attitude of "every man for himself, survival of the fittest, devil take the hindmost", ... but also, that all the possible advantages (however gained), success (however won) and satisfaction (whatever the cost to others) belong to me first!" Narrow-focus, narrow-gauge pseudo-Darwinian selfishness glorified as a sensible philosophy of society and life.

People who find it hard to say "I'm all right Jack!" outright, say to anyone they find no longer useful: "I'm trying to get my life in order right now, so can you respect that, please?!..." (just before they throw themselves laughing into more fun and merry chaos!)

by kofi May 19, 2003