33 definitions by Klopek007
Achy Breaky Hannah is a name for the process which that hot little piece of jailbait Miley Cyrus and/or her pointless alter-ego will soon undergo. Following in the footsteps of Britney Spears, her weight will balloon up, she'll get knocked up by a trailer-trash wigger and drink heavily during the pregnancy, make numerous public appearances going commando in a short dress, enter/quit rehab at least five times, and finally be found in bed one morning with an empty bottle of pills and an empty bottle of rum.
Once Miley completes the long process of Achy Breaky Hannah, she'll just be yet another one of the garden-variety pop-stars who all sound exactly alike and yet somehow draw tons of pre-teen fans. At least it's still a bigger accomplishment than her one-hit-wonder father.
by Klopek007 January 26, 2010
A fake news show on Comedy Central that was once really quite funny, similar to Weekend Update on SNL. However, it steadily became less and less about general news and on-location segments with crazy people, and instead became more and more about just politics, until it was little more than left wing propaganda and frankly not even remotely funny. This change was largely due to the application of the Jon Stewart formula.
Man1: Do you remember when The Daily Show used to be funny?
Man2: Just barely. I have some very foggy memories in the back of my head of what The Daily Show was like before it started sucking bigtime.
Man2: Just barely. I have some very foggy memories in the back of my head of what The Daily Show was like before it started sucking bigtime.
by Klopek007 March 7, 2010
Villain from the Harry Potter series. He is a dark lord, but contrary to popular belief, he is not THE Dark Lord. He has nowhere near the power or terror of Morgoth Bauglir or Sauron the Abhorred. He is also a total pussy when compared to Darth Sidious, Darth Vader, or frankly any darth.
Teenager: Voldemort is the greatest villain of all time!!!
Twentysomething adult: Yeah, sure he is....
Twentysomething adult: Yeah, sure he is....
by Klopek007 February 22, 2010
The Scenario: You're driving along on a relatively deserted two-lane highway, at night, in the right-hand lane. You encounter another vehicle, either behind you or in front of you, in either lane. Eventually, the other vehicle ends up in the left lane, about half a car-length behind you. If the driver had half a brain and basic knowledge of highway driving, they would either pass you, or merge behind you. Instead, it's some brain-dead moron who matches your speed exactly and stays in the same place, thus blinding you with headlights into your side-view mirror. It's especially annoying with a truck or SUV.
The Maneuver: Check your rear-view to make sure there's nobody behind you in your lane. Apply the brakes firmly; not enough to leave rubber behind, but enough for significant deceleration. If you have a manual transmission, or the fairly new "semi-automatic" or "manumatic" transmission, then you should also downshift in order to heighten the effect. The dumbass in the other lane will then fly by you. The advantages are twofold: the other driver will likely be confused about your sudden braking and worry that you saw something that they missed, and also you're now in a perfect position to aim your lights into their side-view mirror, thereby turning the tables.
The Maneuver: Check your rear-view to make sure there's nobody behind you in your lane. Apply the brakes firmly; not enough to leave rubber behind, but enough for significant deceleration. If you have a manual transmission, or the fairly new "semi-automatic" or "manumatic" transmission, then you should also downshift in order to heighten the effect. The dumbass in the other lane will then fly by you. The advantages are twofold: the other driver will likely be confused about your sudden braking and worry that you saw something that they missed, and also you're now in a perfect position to aim your lights into their side-view mirror, thereby turning the tables.
The Skywalker Speeder Bike Maneuver is named in honor of Jedi Knight Luke Skywalker. In Star Wars episode VI: Return of the Jedi, he went from having two Imperial Scout Troopers on his 6 o'clock to having them at his 12 o'clock, where he quickly dispatched them.
by Klopek007 April 6, 2010
While it may one day be possible in the future, sex change is but a myth in this day and age. Even though it is legally recognized, so-called "sex change surgery" is in reality nothing more than genital mutilation and body modification followed by hormone treatments.
It goes by many fanciful, inventive, politically correct names: sex reassignment surgery, sex reassignment therapy, gender reassignment, genital reconstruction surgery, or sex affirmation surgery.
But the pure and simple fact is that people conceived with XX chromosomes are female, and people conceived with XY chromosomes are male. There is currently no known medical procedure to change this in any way. Changing sex will be possible when and if such technology is developed, but until such time it remains a myth.
It goes by many fanciful, inventive, politically correct names: sex reassignment surgery, sex reassignment therapy, gender reassignment, genital reconstruction surgery, or sex affirmation surgery.
But the pure and simple fact is that people conceived with XX chromosomes are female, and people conceived with XY chromosomes are male. There is currently no known medical procedure to change this in any way. Changing sex will be possible when and if such technology is developed, but until such time it remains a myth.
Normal Man: Sorry, but you were born a man, and I'm strictly heterosexual, therefore I want nothing to do with you.
Disfigured Man: But I had sex change surgery! I'm legally a woman now!
Normal Man: No, you're just a feminine-looking man with XY chromosomes and mutilated genitals. Not interested.
Disfigured Man: But I had sex change surgery! I'm legally a woman now!
Normal Man: No, you're just a feminine-looking man with XY chromosomes and mutilated genitals. Not interested.
by Klopek007 March 24, 2010
A freakin' hot-ass girl that I'm in love with.
I've heard rumors that she might have a career in music, but I have no idea. I've honestly never heard any songs by her, but I could look at her photoshoots all day long.
I've heard rumors that she might have a career in music, but I have no idea. I've honestly never heard any songs by her, but I could look at her photoshoots all day long.
by Klopek007 March 24, 2010
It's your standard garden variety "gay lesbian bi transgender" but minus the transgender.
A small but savvy minority of GLB people recognize that GLB causes are not the same as transgender causes. The former has to do with sexual orientation, the latter has to go with gender identity regardless of sexual orientation. People who support this view do not think that transgendered people should have no rights, but simply that they have nothing to do with GLB rights, and therefore oppose the use of the term GLBT and the countless other variants with all sorts of different letter combinations on the end.
The most outspoken proponent of this view is John Aravosis. He has pointed out that GLB activists have been trying to pass the Employment Non-Discrimination Act (ENDA) for 30+ years, and just when it actually had a chance of finally passing in 2007, they tacked on the T to make GLBT, and then it had no chance of passing. Thus, the initialism GLBT (and any other unnecessarily long variant) has actually held back GLB rights.
A small but savvy minority of GLB people recognize that GLB causes are not the same as transgender causes. The former has to do with sexual orientation, the latter has to go with gender identity regardless of sexual orientation. People who support this view do not think that transgendered people should have no rights, but simply that they have nothing to do with GLB rights, and therefore oppose the use of the term GLBT and the countless other variants with all sorts of different letter combinations on the end.
The most outspoken proponent of this view is John Aravosis. He has pointed out that GLB activists have been trying to pass the Employment Non-Discrimination Act (ENDA) for 30+ years, and just when it actually had a chance of finally passing in 2007, they tacked on the T to make GLBT, and then it had no chance of passing. Thus, the initialism GLBT (and any other unnecessarily long variant) has actually held back GLB rights.
by Klopek007 March 24, 2010