34 definitions by Justanotherguy
Not to be confused with the small elevator-like devices found in restaurants, hotels and such, "dumb-waiter" refers to the idiot - and there's always one - serving hors d'oeuvres to the bride and groom at a wedding who allows their tray to be pillaged of anything edible before they even get to the wedding party. Thus, they only have Spinach Vomit-bombs left by the time they get to the bride and groom, who wrap a bunch of these disgusting ass nuggets in a napkin to later pelt the wait staff with when no one's looking.
"Not surprisingly, the maitre d' assigned the dumb-waiter to bring hors d'oeuvres to the wedding party, and the fat shits lumbering up the front steps emptied the tray before the guy even got there."
by Justanotherguy March 15, 2010
The American public waits wringing its hands to find out how Obama will declare that the assassination in Libya was Bush's fault.
by Justanotherguy October 17, 2012
A special version of the popular board game Monopoly, but with a few extra rules:
- One player gets designated the "Welfare Recipient." He sits on the GO square through the entire game, but every time someone else collects money from either rent or passing GO, he gets to collect 10% of it from that player for doing absolutely nothing.
- The Welfare Recipient can, on occasion, go to the Jail square at his leisure, but it is never his fault if he does so, and while there, all the other players must pay $20 every time they pass GO to keep him fed, clothed, warm, and with healthcare while he is in jail.
- On the return trip to the GO square from jail:
-- if the Welfare Recipient lands on any tax squares, the other players must pay it for him in equal shares;
-- if he lands on a rent square, the landlord collects rent from the bank instead of the Welfare Recipient
-- if he lands on Free Parking, he gets to collect any windfall to simulate taking his welfare check to the casino
-- if he lands on a railroad at the same time as another player, he may mug them for 1/5 of their total cash or, if that share would be less than $100, he can kill that player, ending the game for them.
The Welfare Recipient must also always use the CRACK PIPE as their piece of choice; if one doesn't exist, use a real one instead.
- One player gets designated the "Welfare Recipient." He sits on the GO square through the entire game, but every time someone else collects money from either rent or passing GO, he gets to collect 10% of it from that player for doing absolutely nothing.
- The Welfare Recipient can, on occasion, go to the Jail square at his leisure, but it is never his fault if he does so, and while there, all the other players must pay $20 every time they pass GO to keep him fed, clothed, warm, and with healthcare while he is in jail.
- On the return trip to the GO square from jail:
-- if the Welfare Recipient lands on any tax squares, the other players must pay it for him in equal shares;
-- if he lands on a rent square, the landlord collects rent from the bank instead of the Welfare Recipient
-- if he lands on Free Parking, he gets to collect any windfall to simulate taking his welfare check to the casino
-- if he lands on a railroad at the same time as another player, he may mug them for 1/5 of their total cash or, if that share would be less than $100, he can kill that player, ending the game for them.
The Welfare Recipient must also always use the CRACK PIPE as their piece of choice; if one doesn't exist, use a real one instead.
For some odd reason, the guy playing the Welfare Recipient is impossible to beat at Liberal Monopoly...
by Justanotherguy March 1, 2013
Any small but dense food item served as an hors d'oeuvres at a wedding; the Spinach Vomit-bomb is the most common type of Assembly-safe Shuriken. Since there are always dozens of these left over when the cocktail hour has expired, mischievous guests load their pockets with them, then fling them at annoying guests - which is hard to spot when in a room with 225 people. Typical victims include annoying mother-in-laws, the guy who showed up in the white tux with a pickle stashed in his underpants, and that annoying aunt who manages to interrupt every dance and photo opportunity to get her ugly flowered dress and $10 Wal-Mart sneakers into the frame.
"Aunt May was being a total douchehound so I pegged that bitch in the head with an Assembly-safe Shuriken. Now they can get the wedding party photos done while she combs crumbs out of her hair for an hour."
by Justanotherguy March 15, 2010
A poor replacement for breakfast, originating in the Anthrax song "Milk." Toss some wheat thins in a bowl, pour beer in it, and eat like it's cereal. Just remember the Anthrax lyrics when you try it.
by Justanotherguy February 2, 2005
An atheist is a person who does not believe in the existence of *ANY* god(s). This term is consistently misused in modern society.
- Refusing to worship God doesn't make one an atheist. If one says things like "well God lets this stuff happen, so I don't believe in him...," it demonstrates that one does believe in God, they just choose not to follow him.
- Many self-proclaimed "atheists" actually hate God. Since it is illogical to hate something you profess does not exist, people who hate God cannot by definition be atheists. If your attitude is "well God lets this happen, so screw Him..." then you're not an atheist.
- People who "don't believe in Jesus" aren't atheists, they're just not Christians. Jews don't believe in Jesus either, that doesn't make them atheists.
- People who say "I'll find out when I get there" aren't atheists, they're agnostics.
- People who join a "National Organization of Atheists" are not atheists; if you don't believe something exists, you don't make a society dedicated to not believing it exists. That's nonsense.
- Refusing to worship God doesn't make one an atheist. If one says things like "well God lets this stuff happen, so I don't believe in him...," it demonstrates that one does believe in God, they just choose not to follow him.
- Many self-proclaimed "atheists" actually hate God. Since it is illogical to hate something you profess does not exist, people who hate God cannot by definition be atheists. If your attitude is "well God lets this happen, so screw Him..." then you're not an atheist.
- People who "don't believe in Jesus" aren't atheists, they're just not Christians. Jews don't believe in Jesus either, that doesn't make them atheists.
- People who say "I'll find out when I get there" aren't atheists, they're agnostics.
- People who join a "National Organization of Atheists" are not atheists; if you don't believe something exists, you don't make a society dedicated to not believing it exists. That's nonsense.
There are very few true atheists in the world. Most "atheists" are actually just people with an axe to grind with God.
by Justanotherguy February 12, 2013
When you come to Urbandictionary.com and flood the site with stupid definitions about Mitt Romney or Barrack Obama as if anyone's vote hinges on your so-called wit.
The Urban Campaigning after every debate left the editors with a veritable shitstorm of asinine definitions to sort through which, while funny and sometimes even true, are generally worthless and unoriginal. I know, because I am one.
by Justanotherguy October 26, 2012