InTheKitchenCookingActualPies's definitions

friendship burger

A friendship burger is the kind of burger you get with a friend. This phrase is the best way to note that your burger-getting is platonic and friendly in nature. The antonym to "sexy burger" where one shares a burger date with someone with whom they share sexual ideals.

Bebe: "But for real, if you want to grab a friendship burger sometime, let me know!"
Ver: "Yeah, lemme just wait til I'm done with my diet this month"
Bebe: "Cool cool... just wanted to make sure you didn't think I wanted to get a sexy burger with ya, friend!"

by InTheKitchenCookingActualPies February 23, 2019

accidental neckbeardism

When one employs the well-intentioned albeit condescending misogynism of a neckbeard by mistake, often through a misunderstanding that occurs through timing or coincidence.

Woke guy #1: Just left rehearsal for Fiddler on the Roof and still had my fedora on. Went to fix it as this woman walked by me, and I'm pretty sure she thought I was tipping my hat to her.

Woke guy #2: Man, what an accidental neckbeardism. Bet you just want to die.

by InTheKitchenCookingActualPies February 4, 2019

emirate

when you mean "am I right" as in "amirite" but autocorrect thinks you mean "emirate" as in "United Arab Emirates"

I'm looking pretty fly in my new jeans emirate????

by InTheKitchenCookingActualPies January 3, 2018

Koalaty Time

A pun used to describe the time spent when you and your lover are snuggling, wrapped up in each others arms, facing each other. Like how a koala hugs onto a tree. You are usually really super in love if you spend koalaty time together.

Guy: "I can't wait to see my girl later -- we're going to spend some serious koalaty time together."

Other Guy: "Man, you guys must be in love! She's total wifey material, I'm happy for you guys."

by InTheKitchenCookingActualPies April 8, 2017

soft move-in

When you and the person you're dating decide you're going to move in together, and you decide to move into one persons existing apartment because they have more stuff than you, and it's so much easier for the person with less stuff to move in.

If a person with a lot of stuff moves in, it's a big deal, it's noisy, it can be a real hard move-in. But if the person with less stuff moves in to the place where all the stuff is already, it's not a huge ordeal, it's quiet, no one needs a u-haul, therefore it's a soft move-in.

All the benefits of living together with as little hardship of moving.

Girl: "I'd love to meet up with you tonight, but I've got to clear out some room upstairs for my boyfriends massive computer system and I'll make some bathroom space too."

Other girl: "Oh cool, you guys are doing a soft move-in, huh?"

Girl: "Yeah, I'm excited! He gets a closet too, but doesn't really have much other stuff."

by InTheKitchenCookingActualPies March 27, 2017

Duck

What the iPhone autocorrects "fuck" to, when never do you ever actually mean to type "duck".

Guy texting: "baby, I'm going to duck the shit out of you later."

Girl texting: "please tell me you mean fuck...?"

Guy texting: "ugh, yes. Ducking Siri."

by InTheKitchenCookingActualPies December 28, 2016

Five dollar foot long

When a guy doesn't have much money, but he's got a big dick.

Girl: "I've been hanging around this new guy lately... he can't pay my bills, but his dick is enormous."
Other girl: "Ah, sounds like a total five dollar foot long."

by InTheKitchenCookingActualPies December 13, 2016