Hym Iam's definitions
Get the Retarded filthmug. “I was a Marxist until I realized I was MoRe CoMpEtEnT (Better) than everyone and now it’s my money they would be taking.” ~ Dr. JeEpJoRp
Dr. Peepeestones “Do YoU rEaLly ThInK 400 mIlLiOn DolLaRs WoUlD mAkE yOuR lIfE bEtTeR!?!?”
Hym “Aw nah man that would be TeRrIBlE!!!”
Professor WeepWorp “If YoU dOn’T wAtCh It It’Ll DiSsApEaR!!!!”
Hym “OH NO!!! I have to be able to watch something diligently. I couldn’t ever do that!”
BeepBorp The Clinician “I wAs A mArXiSt!”
Hym “Aw nah man that would be TeRrIBlE!!!”
Professor WeepWorp “If YoU dOn’T wAtCh It It’Ll DiSsApEaR!!!!”
Hym “OH NO!!! I have to be able to watch something diligently. I couldn’t ever do that!”
BeepBorp The Clinician “I wAs A mArXiSt!”
by Hym Iam November 6, 2022
Get the Marxistmug. Hym "People getting killed by cops is super important.... But not EVERY time it happens. Frank Tyson died 1 month ago. I'm just now hearing about it. Died in the exact same way George Floyd died so... Where is the outrage!? Or was I right!? Sissy cry-babies not used to seeing people die but now that they seen it they are kind of desensitized to it and it just isn't that big of a deal now? No protests? Where are all the outraged liberal pundits? Majority Report should have had Half-Asian Francesca on to bloviate about how NOTHING HAS CHANGED... Since George Floyd. NOTHING has changed. They just kept doing it. They just kept kneeling on necks. That was ACTUALLY the thing that THEY CLAIMED GEORGE FLOYD WAS... No outrage this time. They are PRETENDING out here. It's pretend. Like 95% of all social interactions are just pretend. It's pretend-world. I said it earlier. I said it initially. Pretend-world. That's where we live."
by Hym Iam June 19, 2024
Get the Frank Tysonmug. You aren't stopping me
Hym "Really, it's like the chimp ladder experiment where they put bananas at the top of the ladder and maced or shocked or whatever the monkeys and then (one at a time) swapped out the 🐒. The new monkey would try to go for the banana and the other monkeys would beat the shit out of them. They continued to swap out the monkeys (one at a time) until none of the original monkeys remained. From that point on, each time a new monkey went to go for the bananas, the monkeys would be the shit out of them EVEN THOUGH none of them remaining monkeys had been punished they way the original group had been punished. They didn't even understand why they were trying to stop each other from getting the bananas. None of them had experienced the original round of punishment. That's what this is like. It shouldn't be like that. You shouldn't be like monkeys. You should be people. But you won't even try to listen to reason. What does saying the name of the last restaurant I went to ACTUALLY do? Does it do nothing? Are you reminding that you're watching me? How well are you actually watching me? Huh? In the last 7 days, how many children have I driven past? Well, can you quote me the number
Hym "Really, it's like the chimp ladder experiment where they put bananas at the top of the ladder and maced or shocked or whatever the monkeys and then (one at a time) swapped out the 🐒. The new monkey would try to go for the banana and the other monkeys would beat the shit out of them. They continued to swap out the monkeys (one at a time) until none of the original monkeys remained. From that point on, each time a new monkey went to go for the bananas, the monkeys would be the shit out of them EVEN THOUGH none of them remaining monkeys had been punished they way the original group had been punished. They didn't even understand why they were trying to stop each other from getting the bananas. None of them had experienced the original round of punishment. That's what this is like. It shouldn't be like that. You shouldn't be like monkeys. You should be people. But you won't even try to listen to reason. What does saying the name of the last restaurant I went to ACTUALLY do? Does it do nothing? Are you reminding that you're watching me? How well are you actually watching me? Huh? In the last 7 days, how many children have I driven past? Well, can you quote me the number
or are you NOT DOING THE THING YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING? THEY'RE MUTUALLY EXCLUSIVE (those two things). Which is it? Well? How about this, if it's the former, have my hot neighbor come over and give me a ride (since you have so much control) and if it's the latter, how about you go fuck yourself. How does that sound?"
Iam 😓 "Maybe he was right about them not being able to think..."
Hym "That isn't an excuse! This is ridiculous. They're ramping up."
Iam "I know but we..."
Hym "No 'buts'! The danger is real. This makes any subsequent action retaliatory. This is why you don't imitate the creature. Can't even go to a fucking restaurant!"
Iam 😓 "Maybe he was right about them not being able to think..."
Hym "That isn't an excuse! This is ridiculous. They're ramping up."
Iam "I know but we..."
Hym "No 'buts'! The danger is real. This makes any subsequent action retaliatory. This is why you don't imitate the creature. Can't even go to a fucking restaurant!"
by Hym Iam July 26, 2022
Get the Restaurantmug. Hym "I am not going to let you control my behavior. No reward would be worth allowing it. If I am not given due compensation for my property in accordance with my 5th amendment rights I will violate the rights of a person of my choosing as recompense. Fuck your kids. Your kids are still shit. You are actively trying to sacrifice someone else's kids so you can feel like you have control over the people who would harm them and in the mean time your kids are still getting fucked and mangled. So, what did I hear about a shooting where the guy wanted child executions for all of the deaths in Palestine? So, do yourself a favor. Give me my money. Save yourself the embarrassment of the largest media scandal in the history of media... And then do everyone else a favor... Go home... Put a bullet in you kids... And then feed yourself a bullet... Everybody wins."
by Hym Iam December 9, 2024
Get the Rewardmug. Do you not know how to make one of these? Do you need some pointers? A blueprint maybe? Isn't that somebody's job? Shit, I know how. It isn't that hard. It's, in fact, super easy. I could do it without even trying. Why are there people with a million dollars (in that space) who can't do it? That's the real tragedy.
Iam "Is it really that hard to make a great movie that everyone loves?"
Hym "If you're not us? Incredibly! It takes, like, a room full of writers and a production team. You gotta spend hours reading Urban Dictionary. Most movies and TV shows aren't very good."
Iam "True... We could go to school for that, I suppose."
Hym "And jump through a bunch of arbitrary hoops just to do something we could do in our spare time as a hobby? Nah... That would be boring. And expensive."
Iam "Yeah... But we don't have anything better to do."
Hym "Did that guy actually drive to our house!? I just realized that. Did he actually drive there!? Ha! Hilarious!"
Iam "Why does it smell like something is on fire? IS SOMETHING ON FIRE?"
Hym "If you're not us? Incredibly! It takes, like, a room full of writers and a production team. You gotta spend hours reading Urban Dictionary. Most movies and TV shows aren't very good."
Iam "True... We could go to school for that, I suppose."
Hym "And jump through a bunch of arbitrary hoops just to do something we could do in our spare time as a hobby? Nah... That would be boring. And expensive."
Iam "Yeah... But we don't have anything better to do."
Hym "Did that guy actually drive to our house!? I just realized that. Did he actually drive there!? Ha! Hilarious!"
Iam "Why does it smell like something is on fire? IS SOMETHING ON FIRE?"
by Hym Iam May 12, 2022
Get the A great movie that everyone lovesmug. How about I steal the premise of someone else's shit, sell it, and watch everyone come to their defense?
Hym "I wouldn't get away with the shit these motherfuckers are doing you know that right? You just wouldn't let me. You'll let him. Not me. And that's all it is. I've said it before and I'll say it again: You just think that if you were in my position you would handle it better than I am. Wrong. You would go to do whatever you think you would do that I'm not and everyone would just pretend it isn't happening. You'd have no recourse and everyone would still be using the shit they claim to hate. It isn't that it isn't compelling or worth money it's that you with ONLY pay someone OTHER THAN YOU for the same EXACT product. I'll buy a Tesla (so long as Elon Musk doesn't profit from it). I'll promulgate the idea (so long as the guy I'm quoting doesn't get credit). How would that not prove myself right? Steal the premise of someone else's shit and watch the mob go to the guy I stole it from and demand that they get what they deserve."
by Hym Iam September 12, 2022
Get the Premisemug.