HMB 's definitions
A daily newspaper, founded in 1982, and funded by the Unification Church and Reverend Sun Myun Moon. Although begun as a conservative counterweight to Communism, the newspaper has gradually won respect for its journalism. Today, it is held in high esteem for its Metropolitan pages and its non-ideological foreign news pages, although the editorial coverage still retains a firmly conservative viewpoint.
Ever since HMB went to work at the Washington Times, his contributions at urbandictionary have tapered off into nothingness. One can only hope that his literary output is being put to equally creative uses.
by HMB March 6, 2004
Get the Washington Times mug.1. (horticultural) A perennial bud found in moist valleys, amidst ferns, and which like to nestle up against redwoods.
2. (anatomical) A perineal bud found in moist valleys, amidst pubes, and which like to be jostled by redwoods. A clit.
2. (anatomical) A perineal bud found in moist valleys, amidst pubes, and which like to be jostled by redwoods. A clit.
1. and 2. "For Valentine's Day, do something special. Give her LADYWOOD."
~ failed marketing ploys of HM&B corporation.
(First heard in NBC's Will & Grace)
~ failed marketing ploys of HM&B corporation.
(First heard in NBC's Will & Grace)
by HMB February 10, 2004
Get the ladywood mug.A medical procedure in which a person puts on a rubber cock. Frequently done before instances of lesbian sex.
"I underwent a strapadictomy with my lesbian lover, Minjita."
by HMB July 26, 2003
Get the strapadictomy mug.1. A category of smoothbore firearm that fires pellets (shot) or slugs. Comes in break-action or pump-action variants. Known to cause fits of unpredictable joy in HMBs.
2. A method of defecation whereby the buttocks are spread prior to discharge.
3. An esoteric form of bukkake. Upon reaching the vinegar strokes, the shotgun initiator must hold his scrotum in one hand and his shaft in the other, and pump between each ejaculation. This is derived from the manner of operating a pump-action shotgun, although the ammunition in question is completely different.
4. Any wedding whereby the groom is extremely morose and the bride is extremely pregnant.
5. A type of corridor-style house where the front door and back door line up and are usually directly connected by a single, straight hallway.
2. A method of defecation whereby the buttocks are spread prior to discharge.
3. An esoteric form of bukkake. Upon reaching the vinegar strokes, the shotgun initiator must hold his scrotum in one hand and his shaft in the other, and pump between each ejaculation. This is derived from the manner of operating a pump-action shotgun, although the ammunition in question is completely different.
4. Any wedding whereby the groom is extremely morose and the bride is extremely pregnant.
5. A type of corridor-style house where the front door and back door line up and are usually directly connected by a single, straight hallway.
1. The TIE Pilot HuManBing was lying in wait, with his shotgun sight trained on a hill.
His recent work freelancing had tired him of late, so he took some time off for a kill.
Away on a hilltop, cavorting around, effete and effeminate prey,
Were multiple Yoshi, inchoate and dozy, about whom the TIE Pilot said:
"Blood! Blood! Glorious blood! Nothing quite like it to make one feel good!
So slide-shuck your shotgun, assuming you've got one,
And then we'll go pot some for glorious blood!"
(This can be sung to the tune of "The Hippopotamus" if so desired.)
2. Last night, I ate so much curry and then took a shotgun dump, and now my toilet is full of crapnel that won't flush away.
3. "It is inadvisable for neophyte bukkakist to attempt shotgun without presence of trained professional medical team. Please also to ensure that said team is well equipped with defibrillators, Viagra, and large cotton sock in case of emergency." *demure titter, covers face with fan* ~ Speech given at the entrance of the Sapporo Tourist Baths by the geisha guide.
4. Girlfriend: Guess what, Brad!
Boyfriend: You're going to put a stud in your tongue and use ice cubes next time?
Girlfriend: No - I'm pregnant! :D
Boyfriend: SHIT.
Girlfriend: We're going to have a baby! :D
Boyfriend: FUCK.
Girlfriend: There's going to be the pitter-patter of little feet in the house! :D
Boyfriend: ARSE.
Girlfriend: What type of marriage would you like? White or peach?
Boyfriend: SCROTE.
Girlfriend: Ohmygosh I'm going to have to call all my girlfriends so they can come over to coo and fawn solicitously in a sickening display of female hormonal Pavlovian response! :D
Boyfriend: TIT.
Girlfriend: What's the matter, dear? I sense a divergence of our emotive dispositions at this juncture.
Boyfriend: I'M NOT MARRYING ANYBODY. GODDAMIT I'M ONLY 23.
Girlfriend: Well, my Daddy's a federal marshal. We *could* make it a Magnum funeral, if you prefer.
Boyfriend: ...
Girlfriend: (singing, unhelpfully) Goin' to the cha-pel an' we're - gonna get ma-a-a-ried...
5. Agent Powell, here are your mission objectives:
A) Ride SHOTGUN with the Ret. Gen. to the Crawford rural area.
B) Approach SHOTGUN ranch through front door.
C) Force entry using rifled slug ammunition in SHOTGUN to remove the locking mechanism.
D) De-elect the resident with a SHOTGUN to the face.
E) Locate and de-elect the vice-resident with a SHOTGUN to the face.
F) After which, lower trousers and apply generous SHOTGUN to the face.
G) Spray Lysol in the air. It is the polite thing to do.
His recent work freelancing had tired him of late, so he took some time off for a kill.
Away on a hilltop, cavorting around, effete and effeminate prey,
Were multiple Yoshi, inchoate and dozy, about whom the TIE Pilot said:
"Blood! Blood! Glorious blood! Nothing quite like it to make one feel good!
So slide-shuck your shotgun, assuming you've got one,
And then we'll go pot some for glorious blood!"
(This can be sung to the tune of "The Hippopotamus" if so desired.)
2. Last night, I ate so much curry and then took a shotgun dump, and now my toilet is full of crapnel that won't flush away.
3. "It is inadvisable for neophyte bukkakist to attempt shotgun without presence of trained professional medical team. Please also to ensure that said team is well equipped with defibrillators, Viagra, and large cotton sock in case of emergency." *demure titter, covers face with fan* ~ Speech given at the entrance of the Sapporo Tourist Baths by the geisha guide.
4. Girlfriend: Guess what, Brad!
Boyfriend: You're going to put a stud in your tongue and use ice cubes next time?
Girlfriend: No - I'm pregnant! :D
Boyfriend: SHIT.
Girlfriend: We're going to have a baby! :D
Boyfriend: FUCK.
Girlfriend: There's going to be the pitter-patter of little feet in the house! :D
Boyfriend: ARSE.
Girlfriend: What type of marriage would you like? White or peach?
Boyfriend: SCROTE.
Girlfriend: Ohmygosh I'm going to have to call all my girlfriends so they can come over to coo and fawn solicitously in a sickening display of female hormonal Pavlovian response! :D
Boyfriend: TIT.
Girlfriend: What's the matter, dear? I sense a divergence of our emotive dispositions at this juncture.
Boyfriend: I'M NOT MARRYING ANYBODY. GODDAMIT I'M ONLY 23.
Girlfriend: Well, my Daddy's a federal marshal. We *could* make it a Magnum funeral, if you prefer.
Boyfriend: ...
Girlfriend: (singing, unhelpfully) Goin' to the cha-pel an' we're - gonna get ma-a-a-ried...
5. Agent Powell, here are your mission objectives:
A) Ride SHOTGUN with the Ret. Gen. to the Crawford rural area.
B) Approach SHOTGUN ranch through front door.
C) Force entry using rifled slug ammunition in SHOTGUN to remove the locking mechanism.
D) De-elect the resident with a SHOTGUN to the face.
E) Locate and de-elect the vice-resident with a SHOTGUN to the face.
F) After which, lower trousers and apply generous SHOTGUN to the face.
G) Spray Lysol in the air. It is the polite thing to do.
by HMB December 17, 2004
Get the shotgun mug.Meno - abbreviation of menopausal
by HMB July 9, 2021
Get the Meno mug.The state or act of being pretentious - affecting an air of superiority or culture where none truly exists.
"The latest discovery of Jane Austen's unprinted masterpiece, 'Pointlessness and Pretentiosity', brings together the dramatic cycle with a fitting juxtaposition of anagnorisis and perepetaea, providing the quintessential climax and denouement if you will, to a genre that is already fucking full of shit to be honest."
Siskel and Ebert, "Two-Birdies-Up Film Reviews"
Siskel and Ebert, "Two-Birdies-Up Film Reviews"
by HMB March 27, 2003
Get the pretentiosity mug.Shorthand for "Hitler's moustache". This describes a woman's pubic hair when she has shaved almost all of it off, leaving only a thin strip of hair covering her vulva.
So named for its similarity to Adolf Hitler's moustache, which was threefold:
a) It was also narrow and dark.
b) It also "lay above the lips".
c) It can move hypnotically, with a strange effect on the weak-minded.
So named for its similarity to Adolf Hitler's moustache, which was threefold:
a) It was also narrow and dark.
b) It also "lay above the lips".
c) It can move hypnotically, with a strange effect on the weak-minded.
I asked my first girlfriend if she would shave her beaver, and it turns out she was a member of PETA so I ended up getting slapped.
Then I asked my second girlfriend if she would shave her Map of Tasmania, and it turns out she was an Australian Aborigine so she cut me with a flint-knapped knife.
Last night I asked my third girlfriend to shave her Hitler tash, and she looked at me and said "I'm Jewish".
If the Mossad come looking for me, I'm not at home, okay?
Then I asked my second girlfriend if she would shave her Map of Tasmania, and it turns out she was an Australian Aborigine so she cut me with a flint-knapped knife.
Last night I asked my third girlfriend to shave her Hitler tash, and she looked at me and said "I'm Jewish".
If the Mossad come looking for me, I'm not at home, okay?
by HMB December 28, 2008
Get the Hitler tash mug.