Funny Moms's definitions

Backside

Backside is the word used to describe when a guy has permission to enter in the alternative option. In general, all guys like to go up the backside but it's a true honor and gift.

Me: I've been dating Joe for six months, and I finally gave him a season pass to go up the backside.
Friend: Shit really? You must love this guy. Oww

by Funny Moms August 8, 2016

Fucknormous

Unfortunately, fuknormous is a natural outcry of a female when she accidentally gets a glimpse of herself in a mirror and realizes she really, really looks fat. Never a good thing, but most likely true. It's a way to self describe that you look enormous. Awful.

V to best gf: oh my god, are you kidding me? I look fucknormous in that window!
Gf: ya kinda sucks, but didn't you say you ate like a pig on your trip to Puerto Vallarta?

by Funny Moms August 8, 2016

Munchausens

Munchausens is a rare, possibly ficticious, disorder that is perfect to use in a situation where one has to get in or out of a social obligation, family event, or work or school obligation. It is rare enough, that when you mention it, people raise their eyebrows in awe, not wanting to question this serious condition. Works best to say your 'friend' has Munchausens, because if someone actually does Google it, you won't want them to think you really have it. The perfect 'out.'

Chauncy: "Hey Karen, do you want to go with me to Opera in the Park tonight?"
Karen: "Oh, wow, thanks, sounds great... unfortunately my friend Jill... her Munchausens ....it's bad."
Chauncy: "Sounds awful..."
Karen: "yep... Munchausens... " Then look down, wipe a tear. Change subject.

by Funny Moms September 11, 2016

Paul from the UK

Paul from the UK, moved to California, from the UK, where he became an overnight success and celebrity. Everyone who meets Paul, loves Paul. T-shirts were made saying "Everybody Loves Paul. Paul from the UK." TV Shows, Fan Clubs, Merchandise, an overnight legend ...Paul is the nicest, most jolly, easy going mate you will ever meet. He is a natural funster, and all who meet him, love him. "Paul Appreciation Week" is held the third week of July. Every year.

Did you go to Taco Tuesday at Norms last night?
Of Course! It's Paul Appreciation Week. Duh.
Everybody Loves Paul. Paul from the UK.

by Funny Moms September 11, 2016

FuckTime

FuckTime is the go-to method for sexual relations when two parties are not in the same vicinity. "FaceTime" is commonly used for seeing family and friends, whereas "FuckTime" is an extension of an intimate sexual relationship, going on-line, in an effort to simulate what might be happening in person, otherwise. A highly effective alternative to Face to Face interactions. Does the job under the difficult long distance circumstances.

Hi babydoll, I'm at my parent's but I think I can FuckTime...

For sure, lock the door, time to FuckTime!

Why did you have to leave town? Thank God for FuckTime! It's actually super hot!

So nice!

by Funny Moms September 17, 2016

THE Dorm

THE Dorm is a place for grown-ups. It is usually an apartment building in a lively part of town, where mostly single, or single divorcees live and really live it up. THE Dorm is an opportunity to re-live your fun party years, but you're not broke and can afford all the luxuries!

Hey, everyone's meeting at THE Dorm tonight! Karen's got it pimped out with everything one could ever want: video games, keg, beer pong, musical instruments. People just come and go at all times of the day and night, everyone loves hanging out at THE Dorm.

by Funny Moms October 22, 2016

stop light texting

Stop light texting is the act of sitting in your car, at an (ideally) long stop light. This is the perfect opportunity to check email, update your FB and scroll through your social media. Typically, if you have teens or children in the car, the act of stop light texting will be rudely interrupted by younger people telling you to stop!

"MOM, stop texting and driving!"
"OMG, I'm stop light texting, leave me alone! Sheesh. You are so over-schooled in this topic!"

by Funny Moms October 26, 2016