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Fearman's definitions

Satan

A man of wealth and taste. (After the Rolling Stones.) His role is much maligned. He actually keeps his minions from sticking in the pitchforks that much harder.
Satan:
Allow me to introduce myself, I'm a man of wealth and taste.
by Fearman October 8, 2007
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wenis

Sinew spelt backwards. Something very soft.
Wenis. Sinew. One or the other.
by Fearman November 11, 2007
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death

Nature's way of reminding you that health foods don't work.
She had a lovely death, up to her eyeballs in water biscuits and cucumber sandwiches.
by Fearman July 6, 2007
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landlord's contract

A written contract that is supposed to make a transaction look above board and official, and to suggest that the buyer has a degree of comeback, but which the party offering the document can ignore at will. As they say, it's not worth the paper it's printed on.
Dickie O'Kelly presented his tenants with the landlord's contract in connection with the quality of their accommodation, and then disappeared to South Africa with their money.
by Fearman August 10, 2007
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Elliott Carver

Played by Jonathan Pryce in Tomorrow Never Dies (1997). Newspaper magnate who likes to make his own stories. Had his wife murdered for colluding with 007 (and thoughtfully put her in his news bulletin). Prepared to risk WW3 in order to secure his market in China. Made the film. The only truly frightening Bond villain in the franchise's history.
Elliott Carver (on Bond's mobile in Hamburg): You have two things belonging to me, Mr. Bond. Now I've found one of them, I've a fair idea where the other one is.

(He is referring to his satellite decoder and his wife. Bond floors the accelerator back to the hotel ...,)
by Fearman August 4, 2007
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PETA

People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (if you ask them), or maybe Pusillanimous Egregious Terrorist Assholes. In cahoots with (or is an alternative front for) the Animal Liberation Front, or ALF. (Assholes Live Forever?)

An extremist organisation on at least the same plane as the various stripes of frankenfearmongers. They are against the use of animals in medical experimentation ... until they get seriously sick themselves, when the use of medicines tested on animals is suddenly AOK. (To take just one example, the organisation's vice-president Mary Beth Sweetland is diabetic and has no problem taking insulin, thereby knowingly using a technology already tested on dogs and rodents. Check it out.) In the name of the rights of animals being raised on fur farms for their pelts they will often set said creatures "free" ... without a moment's thought for either the safety of the "liberated" creatures after a lifetime being tended in a cage, or their impact on the local environment. They have no objection to firebombing anyone they don't believe loves animals as much as they do, or indeed booby-trapping the cars said people drive. They howl at dog pounds and other such for euthanasing animals, while their own organisation is much given to doing the same to the beasties it takes into "care". They terrorise anyone they like without bothering to so much as debate with them or wish them the time of day ... but just wait for one of these "animal-loving" parasites to end up under a cop's baton and listen to them howl about their civil rights. Obviously someone forgot to tell them when they were growing up that deeply unhip old maxim that rights come with responsibilities.

PETA supporters think it's cool that lions chase down wildebeest on the grasslands of Africa, although obviously that's gonna change when they all become citizens with full rights ... a farmer shooting rabbits that are coming for his lettuce, on the other hand, is the spawn of Satan. They enjoy comparing farms to Nazi death camps. I'm sure that goes down a treat with all those Jews, gays and other such folk out there. PETA consists of a rabble of mentally unstable adolescents along with an upper crust of ageing hippies and a few celebrities, at least some of whom should, one would think, be older and wiser. One of their members, model Joanna Krupa, has claimed she'd rather go naked than wear fur ... that makes two of us, darling. You first.

Best thing to do with them is to drop them into a pit full of hungry lions and see how many articles of their manifesto they manage to recite before they have an educational experience.
Might I suggest that PETA finds a better way of loving animals than hating humans?
by Fearman January 3, 2008
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Pierce Brosnan

Attractive but bland Irish actor. From Navan, County Meath. Played James Bond in four movies. Looked perfect in the posters, don't know about the movies; he was a kind of generic Bond without much bite. The first one was a good enough revamp in its way. The second was made by its villain (who, uniquely among Bond baddies, was genuinely scary) into possibly the cream of the franchise. As for the latter two ... what happened?
The name's Brosnan. Pierce Brosnan. Now, where did I leave my personality?
by Fearman August 4, 2007
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