Fearman's definitions
In American politics, something Republicans accuse Democrats of doing when they're too dizzy from doing it themselves.
My fellow Americans, you know you can trust me more than that flip-flopping Democrat Clinton when I tell you this was in Iraq was about freedom, no, hold on a moment, it was about weapons of mass destruction, no, hold on, it was for democracy, no, it was about the Kurds, yeah, that was it, it was about the Kurds. Not about oil or God or any of that stuff. Excuse me, I'm off to bed now.
by Fearman January 15, 2008
Get the flip-floppingmug. An Oxfam shyster is someone who tries to get a further discount in a charity shop (which may or may not be a branch of Oxfam) or who attempts to use the shop as a rubbish bin. Typical tactics include yelling, "I want to donate these, thank you!", leaving a large bag of (say) books at the counter and scooting out the door. Closer examination reveals a single layer of halfway good books (or just covers) overlying a mass of unsaleable and often physically unreadable mulch. The shop is left to discard the mulch because the Oxfam shyster couldn't bother their pretty little fat white arse to take the stuff to the dump themselves. Unlike the private citizen, the shop, being a charity, is (at least under Irish/EU law, dunno about America) obliged to pay a heavy charge on recycling, but who cares? As long as the Oxfam shyster gets their narcissistic business over and done with, that's fine with them, they're all right, Jack, and that's all that matters.
Another tactic is demanding a further discount off already rock-bottom prices because they need the money for something else. Food for the kids, petrol to get home, tins of dog or cat food, you name it. This is typically preceded by a pretense that they can't read price tags, and accompanied by an attempt to make it look like butter wouldn't melt in their mouths by saying they don't want the goods for themselves, but for a kid/relative/whatever who might need the info at a difficult time. Listen, love, if you need more money for petrol but can't afford the extra price of a cheeseburger, have you considered cycling?
Oxfam shysters can be of any age or either gender, but they tend to be elderly women more often than not, probably because this is the slice of the demographic best able to pull off the loveably-gaga routine, while at the same time being least likely to get a richly deserved kick in the toothless jawbone from the sort of well-meaning sucker who is likely to be running the shop. Beware the Oxfam shyster.
Another tactic is demanding a further discount off already rock-bottom prices because they need the money for something else. Food for the kids, petrol to get home, tins of dog or cat food, you name it. This is typically preceded by a pretense that they can't read price tags, and accompanied by an attempt to make it look like butter wouldn't melt in their mouths by saying they don't want the goods for themselves, but for a kid/relative/whatever who might need the info at a difficult time. Listen, love, if you need more money for petrol but can't afford the extra price of a cheeseburger, have you considered cycling?
Oxfam shysters can be of any age or either gender, but they tend to be elderly women more often than not, probably because this is the slice of the demographic best able to pull off the loveably-gaga routine, while at the same time being least likely to get a richly deserved kick in the toothless jawbone from the sort of well-meaning sucker who is likely to be running the shop. Beware the Oxfam shyster.
by Fearman February 1, 2008
Get the Oxfam shystermug. Temporary feeling of exhilaration, or a spurious feeling of authority. From Leonardo di Caprio's lines at the prow of RMS Titanic in James Cameron's 1997 movie.
"I'm the king of the world!!! WOOOO-HOOOOOO!!!"
by Fearman November 11, 2007
Get the king of the worldmug. A written contract that is supposed to make a transaction look above board and official, and to suggest that the buyer has a degree of comeback, but which the party offering the document can ignore at will. As they say, it's not worth the paper it's printed on.
Dickie O'Kelly presented his tenants with the landlord's contract in connection with the quality of their accommodation, and then disappeared to South Africa with their money.
by Fearman August 10, 2007
Get the landlord's contractmug. Played by Jonathan Pryce in Tomorrow Never Dies (1997). Newspaper magnate who likes to make his own stories. Had his wife murdered for colluding with 007 (and thoughtfully put her in his news bulletin). Prepared to risk WW3 in order to secure his market in China. Made the film. The only truly frightening Bond villain in the franchise's history.
Elliott Carver (on Bond's mobile in Hamburg): You have two things belonging to me, Mr. Bond. Now I've found one of them, I've a fair idea where the other one is.
(He is referring to his satellite decoder and his wife. Bond floors the accelerator back to the hotel ...,)
(He is referring to his satellite decoder and his wife. Bond floors the accelerator back to the hotel ...,)
by Fearman August 4, 2007
Get the Elliott Carvermug. by Fearman July 6, 2007
Get the deathmug. Ancient middle eastern divinity who becomes a demon in the Exorcist franchise. Best pronounced in a low-pitched, gravelly, strangled sort of voice followed by at least three short laughs in the same tone.
I am PAZUZU, HA-HA-HA. I am a mean son of a bitch of a devil, but then I screw it all up by protecting expectant mothers.
by Fearman March 11, 2008
Get the Pazuzumug.