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Fearman's definitions

etiquette freak

Someone so obsessed with the minutiae of lower-middle-class good manners that they utterly miss the point of the exercise. The name of the game for these people is not showing consideration for others at all, but merely showing off their own upward mobility in the most vulgar way possible. There are few people more annoying than etiquette freaks, who themselves typically flout the most elementary standards of civilised behaviour every chance they get. A typical etiquette freak would be the character of Hyacinth Bouquet in "Keeping Up Appearances".

There is of course an entire industry of books and other sources supplying the requirements of etiquette freaks, often including such nuggets of folk wisdom as the following, in a book by Angela Lansbury (presumably not the actress): "A lady only has her name in the paper on three occasions in her life: when she is born, when she marries and when she dies."
An etiquette freak will always endeavour to have as many different varieties of knives, forks and spoons for their guests as possible at a dinner party. Preferably all laid out at the same time.
by Fearman August 7, 2007
mugGet the etiquette freakmug.

bump

The expanding belly of a pregnant woman. Some women think it looks like the side of a bus, we do collectively need to watch that population curve, and some psychotic bible-jerkers who call themselves pro-life give the whole thing a tang of sulphur for everyone else, but despite it all, that bump remains one of the most drop-dead gorgeous sexy things in the world.
No, I'm not a creep. Can I PLLLEEEEEASE kiss your bump?
by Fearman December 26, 2007
mugGet the bumpmug.

Christihomoality

The opposite of Christideuteronoleviticality, which is the corruption of the message of the pale (Jewish) Galilean by the 1500-year-older blatherings of a group of psychotic priests who should have done posterity a great big favour and gone out and gotten shagged a whole lot more often.
Long live Christihomoality. Adam and Steve would have STAYED in the GODDAMNED GARDEN.
by Fearman January 5, 2008
mugGet the Christihomoalitymug.

see ya, don't want to be ya

Affected humorous goodbye to someone the speaker can't stand. The bit before the comma is spoken out loud, the rest is more sotto voce; the whole phrase may be repeated straight out to a third party.
Yeah, fine, Travis, whatever you say, love the jacket, see ya, don't want to be ya.
by Fearman March 4, 2008
mugGet the see ya, don't want to be yamug.

Mr. Natural

Long-bearded earthy worldly wise simple genius invented by cartoonist R. Crumb. The only man in history (according to one cartoon) to get a new lease on life when, once he had died, God asked him what he thought of Paradise and his scrupulously honest aesthetic appraisal of the whole place pissed off the Big Man big time. Best known for such catch phrases as "Keep Truckin'".
Mr. Natural, the coolest beardy dude in history, even makes sandals look good.
by Fearman April 11, 2008
mugGet the Mr. Naturalmug.

Peter Stormare

Grim-looking Swedish actor, born 1953, with a waaay wicked sense of humour. Has starred as hitman Gaear Grimsrud in Fargo, porn star Karl Hungus in The Big Lebowski, eye transplant doctor Solomon Eddie in Minority Report, Ernst Roehm in Hitler: The Rise of Evil and Satan in Constantine. Has also done a truly unforgettable series of adverts for Volkswagen (Unpimp my Auto). Film, stage, voice and television actor, theatrical director, musician and playwright. All round rare auld character.
Can't wait to see what Peter Stormare does next.
by Fearman December 26, 2007
mugGet the Peter Stormaremug.

spherical asshole

A complete asshole. An utter waste of chromosomes. Spherical because a complete asshole has no redeeming features whatsoever and is still an asshole no matter which way you look at him/her, just as a sphere presents the same circular outline no matter which direction it is viewed from.
He may have been a junkie for ten years and trashed all his friends, but even when he's gone cold turkey don't expect him to say sorry. He's a spherical asshole.
by Fearman November 11, 2007
mugGet the spherical assholemug.

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