El ritardo's definitions

Kegel Gym

NOT an actual physical fitness gym. It is a place where men go to naturally increase their penis size via male Kegel Exercises.

*Kegel Gym instructor*- Release ...And clench!

by El ritardo June 1, 2019

Putz

Jewish Hebrew term for dick.

When you want to call someone like your mom or brother a dick, just say putz.

by El ritardo December 6, 2017

Jungkook

One hot and incredibly nice Korean dude who unfortunately has less meat than lil dicky himself.

Jungkook is great to hang with, but not in a sexual way.

by El ritardo July 2, 2018

Dinner roll

A hand-rolled blunt saved for immediately before dinner, therefore giving you an appetite.

Hol up, imma roll a dinner roll before going out to eat in Lisbon.

by El ritardo July 16, 2018

dealing myself a hand of solitaire

A rather sophisticated term for masturbating.

My therapist asked me what I did to keep myself busy when I was bored, so I told him that I was always dealing myself a hand of solitaire on Sunday afternoons.

by El ritardo April 17, 2020

Alvin and The Chipmunks

Currently the world’s bestselling midget group. They formed in 1958 and now have multiple feature movies and are still hawt, despite being older than the Beatles.

They’re making another Alvin and the chipmunks movie, so brace yourselves for a level of furry midget ass that we have not yet experienced.

by El ritardo December 6, 2017

Painting some sea dragons

A rather obscure term for wanking. Supposedly originated in Australia.

When they asked me about why I put ‘painting some sea dragons’ on my resume, I told them it was part of the scholastic art competition.

by El ritardo April 17, 2020