Eaton Holgoode's definitions

Breakfast Roll

Female initiated morning sex. The Breakfast Roll is performed when your babe wakes up all wet, hot and horny. Whilst you are still sleeping, she latches ahold of your morning wood, climbs on top and starts riding old morning glory until she climaxes. Breakfast Rolls usually end up with a male climax by finishing you off with a handy or fellatio.

Stan: Carl you are late for work again. This cannot continue. I have a business to run. Why are you constantly late every morning the past two weeks?
Carl: I am sorry Stan. I am out of routine. My old lady keeps doing the Breakfast Roll every morning. Bitch is horned up something fierce. I will stop her next time.
Stan: Hell no Carl. Let the bitch ride it. I will just change your start time!

by Eaton Holgoode May 14, 2015

Greek Ring

The ring of fecal and lubricant remnants found at the base of the penis after anal sex.

Although Rachel prefers not to do ass to mouth (ATM) after anal, she was so horny the other night that after I pulled out her ass, she deep throated the shaft all the way to the Greek ring.

by Eaton Holgoode June 5, 2018

Cold Poppin’

Gingerly insetting a frozen popsicle into your partner’s rectum and letting it melt before removing the stick.

Generally, performed to add a heightened, cold experience and/or sweet flavor to the ass before eating that booty.

I was cold poppin’ Rachel last night with a Bomb Pop. Man dat booty was sweet eats and had me singing the Stars and Stripes.

by Eaton Holgoode October 22, 2018

Bare Handed Surgery

Vigorous, clit frigging, leg shaking, female masturbation.

I walked in on my sister doing some bare handed surgery today. It was hot.

I can’t wait to get home tonight. I’m so horny and ready for some bare handed surgery.

My roommate was up for hours performing some loud bare handed surgery. I couldn’t sleep.

by Eaton Holgoode January 12, 2019

Wetmopping

When a chick with a hairy bush showers but doesn’t dry her pussy when she’s done and she immediately grinds that wet snatch back and forth across your face.

I was soaked last night from Rachel wetmopping me.

by Eaton Holgoode June 6, 2018

Seventh Inning Stretch

When you are at a sports bar and about 3/4 through the game your girl starts to get a little fidgety and horny so she reaches under the table and gives your scrotum a long, stretching tug letting you know it's almost game time.

I had to walk away from the no hitter on tv last night. The seventh inning stretch was too good and had to hit it and quick.

by Eaton Holgoode March 3, 2017

Mount and Balance

1. To engage in sexual intercourse in a non-traditional location or position whereby great care, skill and balance is required to avoid falling, twisting or otherwise resulting in bodily injury.

2. A mechanical term used to refer to the installation of vehicle tires onto wheel rims and weight balancing the wheel for even tread wear.

1. Dan and Carla spiced up their lovemaking by having sex on the roof of their neighbors house. They were able to get off without injury with a successful mount and balance.

2. Frank bough some new shoes for his ride and made sure he paid extra for the mount and balance.

by Eaton Holgoode November 15, 2015