The simultaneous release of both sputum and semen. Typically occurs when one is home sick with a nasty respiratory infection and one tires to make himself feel better by repeatedly masturbating.
I went through 5 boxes of tissues today. Wow. You must have a lot of sputum. No. I had a lot of spumen. My Dick is sore and so is my chest. Nasty!!!
by Eaton Holgoode January 26, 2018
A completely shaved, hairless penile region including a shorn scrotum. Males with a bald jimmy look like a pre-pubescent boy.
Despite appearing to have the genitals of a 10 year old, I love having a bald jimmy. I hate hacking on a hair.
by Eaton Holgoode February 02, 2018
A collection of sexually stimulating items that are used, and often needed, to arouse to enable one to Fap aka jack off. The Gentleman's Handbook applies to all collections of arousing materials including collections of fap material or thoughts and visual images located in one's spank bank.
Finding himself alone and his room mates gone, Roger opened up his Gentlemen's Handbook and riotously viewed his collection of porn and envision the MILF next door as he vigorously fapped himself until his balls were dry, gak towel was soaked and he no longer suffered from an engorged, Leaded Pencil
by Eaton Holgoode January 15, 2015
Alright mutha fuckers who busted cheese? Nasty ass.
I just busted cheese in here so watch out. It’s thick.
This car reeks of busted cheese. So gross.
I just busted cheese in here so watch out. It’s thick.
This car reeks of busted cheese. So gross.
by Eaton Holgoode March 12, 2018
When you are finger banging the old lady and you sneak your pinkie finger tween her ass cheeks and tickle in and/or around her fart box. Usually performed along with oral sex but not always.
by Eaton Holgoode November 27, 2018
The failed attempt to make a proper landing on the toilet seat otherwise known as the landing zone and the bowels are released short of the rim leaving excrement all over the stool and floor. The Louisiana Tail Drop is experienced during explosive diarrhea brought on by too many Cajun style shrimp, oysters and red beans and rice. The condition appears out of nowhere and is accompanied by gut wrenching and imminent sphinctergeddon. In all cases, the onset occurs when one is the furthest from the nearest rest room facility. Due to the intense pressure, simultaneous ass clenching and efforts to remove one's pants and grunders in time, the distance to the bowl is misjudged and the assplosion occurs short of the rim leaving ass gravy.
During a high profile case, attorney Dick Short of the firm Short, Course and Kirley suffered from an unexpected shart attack brought on by his lunch that day at the Rajun Cajun Restaurant. He made a prompt courtroom exit during a five minute recess to relieve his bowels; however he misjudged the distance to the bowl as he was coming in for release and ended up doing Louisiana Tail Drop. While relieved, the mess and the stench caused the court to evacuate and recess for the remainder of the day.
by Eaton Holgoode July 16, 2013
Foreskin of an uncircumcised penis.
I like pulling my ham skin.
She was turned off by my ham skin. She likes cut.
Are you cut or uncut? Ham skinned.
She was turned off by my ham skin. She likes cut.
Are you cut or uncut? Ham skinned.
by Eaton Holgoode February 03, 2018