Definitions by Eaton Holgoode

Fapal Tunnel Syndrome

A noticeable disformity of one or more of the hands giving the appearance that one is holding an invisible penis. The condition is developed over time from excessive, repetitive sessions of fapping and jacking oneself off. Not to be confused with Carpal Tunnel Syndrome.

After graduating college with a useless degree, Scott lived in his parent's basement where he watched porn and fapped himself multiple times a day. After a year of this deviant behavior, he developed a severe case of fapal tunnel syndrome and south the help of a neurologist.

Fapal Tunnel Syndrome by Eaton Holgoode March 24, 2017

Oil Ring 

That greasy feeling around your bun after a wet fart.

I think I need a quick wipe. Pretty sure I got a oil ring after that one.

Oil Ring by Eaton Holgoode March 23, 2017

Smash Juice 

Cum. Ejaculate. Coital creation of bodily love juice.

The sheets were wet as hell from our smash juice.

Smash Juice by Eaton Holgoode March 23, 2017

Dilmonic Possession 

When a female is only able to achieve an orgasm by use of a dildo or dildoic device. Over use has acclimated her body to only achieve the big O with a device.

Sadly, Rachel has dilmonic possession. She's controlled by the vibrator if she wants to cum.

Dilmonic Possession by Eaton Holgoode March 23, 2017

Granny Gagger 

An old woman that loves to deep throat. Toothless is a plus.

I'm going next door to the convalescent center to hook up with my granny gagger.

Granny Gagger by Eaton Holgoode March 23, 2017

Buried Mole 

A flaccid, small, uncircumcised penis hidden deep behind the foreskin. May occasionally peek it's head out.

Carl is a total wanker although I doubt he's able to rub his buried mole.

Dan was always self conscious in the locker room thinking everyone was laughing at his buried mole.

Susie was ready to give Jacob head for the first time but was disappointed when she encountered a buried mole.

Buried Mole by Eaton Holgoode March 23, 2017

Fish Spread 

When ya go down on dat pussy and spread dem lips and she got da stank puss.

Ohhhhhhhh whew baby you gots da fish spread. Wash dat crack.

Fish Spread by Eaton Holgoode March 23, 2017