Definitions by Eaton Holgoode

Grease Trumpet 

When the ass is expelling some of the loudest, wettest sounding flatulence known to man.

Man I’m playing the grease trumpet today. I may have to go wipe.

Grease Trumpet by Eaton Holgoode January 14, 2019

Dook Cutter 

The asshole. The anal sphincter.

C’mon baby let me put it in your dook cutter tonight.

My dook cutter is still drinking after that bout of diarrhea.

Dook Cutter by Eaton Holgoode January 14, 2019

Mud Marauder 

An ass pirate. One who enjoys a little pillaging anal sex. See also ass wrangler, anal spelunker, rump ranger.

My boyfriend is a mud marauder. But I’m not into that.

Mud Marauder by Eaton Holgoode January 14, 2019

Red Dog Surprise 

When someone walks in on a male giving his engoeged, red cock a vigorous wank.

Gave my mom a red dog surprise this morning when she walked in to put some laundry away.

My cousin got a red dog surprise last night so I let her watch.

Red Dog Surprise by Eaton Holgoode January 12, 2019

Bare Handed Surgery

Vigorous, clit frigging, leg shaking, female masturbation.

I walked in on my sister doing some bare handed surgery today. It was hot.

I can’t wait to get home tonight. I’m so horny and ready for some bare handed surgery.

My roommate was up for hours performing some loud bare handed surgery. I couldn’t sleep.

Bare Handed Surgery by Eaton Holgoode January 12, 2019

Pint Princess 

A female of questionable looks and appeal to the sober eye that will require a potential suitor to consume at lease six or move pints of brew for her to become reasonably attractive and desirable for sexual relations.

This bar is full of pint princesses tonight braaaaaahhh. Looks like another hangover is in store.

My cousin is a pint princess. It only took me twelve pints this Christmas for me to put it to her down on the basement after dinner.

Pint Princess by Eaton Holgoode January 10, 2019

A Bad Rash 

1. Euphemism used to describe and/or add emphasis as to how bad a situation may be.

2. A bad rash. Swelling and redness and I some cases itching and chaffing of the skin of an impacted area of the body.

My boss is like a bad rash. Always on my ass and driving me nuts.

I have a bad rash on my taint. I haven’t bathed for several days and it’s getting a tad itchy.

A Bad Rash by Eaton Holgoode January 10, 2019