Definitions by Dr Bunnygirl

weekend orphan 

A kid whose parents are essentially “dead to the world” on the weekends due to addiction.

Heading into Friday afternoon I was already a full-blown weekend orphan.

weekend orphan by Dr Bunnygirl October 19, 2019

snake in the couch 

An effective and often used method to drastically shorten the stay of unwanted houseguests.

My in-laws were coming to stay for a week so I picked up a terrarium and a large, non-venomous snake at House of Reptiles and released it into the couch in the front room which also happened to be their fold-out guest bed and as they walked through the door, my five-year-old son yelled out, “snake in the couch!”

snake in the couch by Dr Bunnygirl October 18, 2019

prison puppy 

A newbie prisoner, someone who has never been inside before.

You can usually pick out the prison puppy right away; he is the one with terror in his eyes, holding tightly onto his stuff, standing apart from everybody else and backed up against the chain link fence at the far end of the holding cage.

prison puppy by Dr Bunnygirl October 18, 2019

program failure

A euphemism for someone who keeps getting in trouble in prison and whose “points” will consequently go up, leading them to a higher security prison setting.

We can’t just wake up one day and say, “Man, I’m gonna move outta this place,” so we just keep rackin’ up the write-ups until we’re labeled a program failure so we can get a change in scenery!

program failure by Dr Bunnygirl October 18, 2019

puppy father 

A male convict, usually a “lifer,” who selflessly takes it upon himself to educate the first-time prisoner about all of the new things he’ll need to know to keep himself out of trouble.

Yup, I’m a damn good puppy father; I’m definitely doing something right this time around!

puppy father by Dr Bunnygirl October 18, 2019

Turkey talking 

When the 45th POTUS repeats the offensive talking points crafted by Turkish President Erdogan by saying that Syria just had to be “cleaned out.”

Of course it’s fucking genocide but I like to use nice words and call it “Turkey talking!”

Turkey talking by Dr Bunnygirl October 18, 2019

War Criminal in Chief 

A new nickname for the 45th POTUS after he green-lighted the mass slaughter of our Kurdish allies in Syria.

This well-deserved nickname may finally allow Trump Jong Un to feel like he’s hit the big time and can be known throughout history as the War Criminal in Chief; he can now join the powerful ranks of all of his deeply loved badass, mass-murdering dictator idols.

War Criminal in Chief by Dr Bunnygirl October 17, 2019