Definitions by DarkCoffee

Waffle Stomp 

When you take a shit in the shower and decide to stomp on the turd to mash it down the drain.

I don’t buy toilet paper anymore, I just shit in the shower and waffle stomp it down the drain.

Waffle Stomp by DarkCoffee January 12, 2025

Eblowtional 

When you’re so emotional, you whip your dick out and blow it in the ocean.

Man: I’m so emotional today, I feel like driving to the ocean, pulling out my average size penis and blowing it in the ocean. I wish I had a name for what I’m feeling….Eblowtional!

Eblowtional by DarkCoffee January 12, 2025

I got that dog in me

When you get mounted by a dog and the red rocket goes in….and in an effort to save face, you try to act tough and start barking and grunting like a giga chad.

Dog: Woof! Woof! I’m gonna mount that man!

Nik: Oh no, not again!

Innocent bystander: Bro that dog is inside you!

Nik: (Obviously embarrassed) Arf! Arf! I got that dog in me! Get on my level!

I got that dog in me by DarkCoffee January 12, 2025

Egg on my face 

When you are embarrassed by your ex girlfriend for leaving a snail trail of other dudes semen behind her everywhere she walks, so you decide to crack a few eggs over your head and let the goo slowly run down your face so you can feel like a cumshot whore without the risk of ruining your self esteem.

Random man: “Jesus Christ man, tell your lady to grab a f**king mop! I almost slipped on her snail trail.”

Nik: “Omg brother I’m so embarrassed (pulled 2 eggs from his pocket and cracks them over his head) now I have egg on my face.”

Egg on my face by DarkCoffee January 12, 2025

Nimp 

A man who willingly funds their ex girlfriends lifestyle while she’s getting blown out and throat f**ked by other guys, and later comes home from work to shove his average size penis into a gaping hole filled with the semen of all his friends, family and neighbors.

“Nik, don’t be such a Nimp. She literally has the neighborhoods semen pouring out of her ear holes, she doesn’t deserve to be taken out to a nice dinner”

Nimp by DarkCoffee January 12, 2025

Sperm Turkey 

When a girl is getting mouth fucked and you bust in her mouth so she sounds like a gobbling turkey

Luke: I was mouth fucking this chick last night and when I was cumming she started gobbling like a sperm turkey.....I was so jealous that she got to experience that.

Sperm Turkey by DarkCoffee July 14, 2021

Tea drinker 

Another word for someone who guzzles cum

Luke: I think I want some tea instead of coffee

Tyler: So in other words, you like to guzzle cum. Fucking tea drinker

Tea drinker by DarkCoffee July 14, 2021