D F Stuckey's definitions

can your granny sew?

A delicate way of telling someone you are about to perform an act of violence upon them, esp. the application of a Liverpool Kiss to the nose or the use of a Stanley knife. Follwed up by the action, then the use of the phrase " Then get THAT stitched!" Scottish traditional folk saying.

English man in pub;"Celtic Thistle are not doig well this year..."
Scot:"Oh Aye? Can your granny sew, mate?"

by D F Stuckey February 14, 2004

that's the way the cookie crumbles

Slang term, origin unknown from the 1920's in America. Used to underline a failure of an action, or dissapointment in reaching an undesired result, with the additional meaning that the result was not an unexpected one.

A:" Well, I asked Cindy out, and she told me to swallow my head . . "
B:"Hey, that's the way the cookie crumbles!"

by D F Stuckey May 26, 2004

grow a set

Insult used to describe a male who is acting in a weak, vacillating or timid manner.

Meant to imply that in order to gain courage the person named needs to develop a "set" of testicles. See get a pair.

David"I'd like to ask Jane out, but . . "
Chris"Oh, grow a set and ask her, will you?"

by D F Stuckey March 1, 2004

take the mickey

To make fun of someone or something, often to mock in a satirical way, or to attempt to fool someone in a manner of telling them an outrageous story.

Often used also to cast doubt on the truth of a statement.

A:"You know, the timers on British nuclear bombs were so bad in the 50's, they thought of filling them with chickens to keep them warm enough"
B:"WHAT! Are you taking the mickey?"

C:" Well, you parked in just the right place here, didn't you?"
A:" Instead of taking the mickey, just find me a big rock to chock the wheels with . . "

by D F STuckey April 6, 2004

builds character

Any task, activity or event which is painful, humiliating, upsetting, violent or distressing to the person experiencing the said task, activity or event.

A sarcastic use of the phrase, as most people believe that the difficult events in our lives contribute the most to our character and personality. Sadly, pyschologists would tend to agree; Not for the better in many cases.

A:"My boyfriend just called. . . He's left me!"
B:" Really?"
A:" For my BROTHER!!!! (Sniff)"
B:"Well . . . It builds character, something like that. . . "
A:"Oh, go kiss a walrus!"

by D F Stuckey July 8, 2004

queer eye for the straight guy

Reality TV program in which five men, expert in such fields as fashion, cooking, decorating and suchlike, take on the task of improving the lifestyle and living conditions of another man; All five are homosexual and with one exception rather camp, and the makeover subject is always straight.

Although entertaining, educational and sometimes amusing, it carries the unspoken message that straight men are in the main uncouth, untidy and useless at choosing clothes and cooking.

A:"you know, I never realised that I shave like I'm in a race or something"
B:"What? Like the guys on 'Queer Eye For the Straight Guy' say it all the time."
pause.
B:"Probably true, though."

by D F Stuckey July 10, 2004

Dutch Salute

Form of greeting, performed by females usually both young and European. The greeter grasps the hem of their shirt in one hand then raises it to the shoulder, exposing the side of the chest are. Always performed without a bra.

There are oftne no sexual connotations involved or implied in this greeting.

"Passing under a motorway bridge, I recieved a Dutch Salute from several pedestrians "

by D F Stuckey February 18, 2004