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Cap'n Bullmoose's definitions

Okie tool kit

A hammer, a screwdriver, and an adjustable wrench (also called a Mexican socket wrench. With these tools, an Okie can repair most malfunctions on his pickup truck.
Lennie Jim carries his Okie tool kit under the seat of his Jimmy pickup truck.
by Cap'n Bullmoose April 23, 2005
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portagee

1. A native, resident, or emigrant from Portugal.

2. A descendant of such a person.

A people with a rich cultural heritage that makes no demands for care and support from their government. They are workers and doers, rather than beggars and takers.

White liberal twits whine that the word is offensive, but the only people offended by the word are white liberal twits. Portagees call themselves Portagees, and love to eat Portagee Soup and linguisa.
Big Joe Portagee is a character in Tortilla Flat.
by Cap'n Bullmoose April 20, 2005
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arse bandit

A turd burglar. A corn holer. A poofter. A fag. A sissy boy. A swish.
Bruce is an arse bandit. He enjoys eating butt for desert.
by Cap'n Bullmoose October 9, 2007
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pad

The sissiest sissy, the pansiest pantywaist. An extremely effeminate male person.

Common mid 1950s use in Northern California. Origin unknow, but it possibly refered to a sanitary pad.
by Cap'n Bullmoose April 21, 2005
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Vulgar Dog

1. William Shakespeare.

Lord Byron wrote that Shakespeare was a vulgar dog.

2. A dog. Any dog.
Bet you can't find me a dog who is not a vulgar dog.
by Cap'n Bullmoose April 30, 2005
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Amos 'n' Andy

The first television show with a black cast. The entrance of black entertainers into mainstream America. The television show to which all black entertainers owe a great debt of thanks. A mighty funny comedy show.

A show despised and feared by white liberal twits, who say it is racist because the Kingfish is a con artist and Andy is stupid. White liberals say that, if you watch this show, you will think that ALL black people are con artists or stupid. If you watch it, you will surely get a compulsion to put on a bedsheet and burn a cross on your neighbor's lawn. (White liberals do not say that if you watch Training Day, you will think that all black people talk toilet talk and are violent. Why not?)
Hillary Clinton and John Kerry do NOT want you to watch Amos 'n' Andy, so there must be something mighty good about it.
by Cap'n Bullmoose May 6, 2005
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homosexual

An extremely offensive word used to villify a poofter, a butt eating faggot, a turd burglar, a corn holer, or a swishy mama's boy.
A person is not born a homosexual. He is not born eating butt or corn holing the dog. A person chooses to become a homosexual. Behavior makes a person a homosexual. You do not become a homosexual by eating chocolate cake. You become a homosexual by eating butt.
Lemony is a homosexual. He enjoys fluttering his wrists, lisping, and going "tsk!" He decided to become a homosexual the day he decided to corn hole the dog.
by Cap'n Bullmoose October 27, 2007
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