10 definitions by Bugsy McDingle

Top Definition
The act of ejaculating in a chicks butt, dipping your index finger in and having a good swirl (best done left handed). After mixing in the bung hole for a while, you remove your finger now basted in the semen entrenched fecal potion. This is done doggie style so the chick is clueless when you reach around and stick your index finger in her mouth and give her a good Polish tooth whitening. Finish off by wiping your dick on her curtains.
When money is tight or you are too cheap to by generic whitening strips, it's always prudent to give your girlfriend with discolored teeth a good old fashion Polish Tooth Whitening the next time she gets a rogering from behind.
by Bugsy McDingle November 19, 2012
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The art of masturbating while enveloped in a self inflicted Dutch Oven. Often done on cold, lonely nights when you couldn't even score with the leftover fatties at the pub. After twelve pints of Guinness and 2am Taco Bell, flatubating is an obvious way to regain some dignity after failing to score. The added benefit is that it's cheaper than buying condoms or cologne. You're having sex with someone you already know. And who doesn't enjoy the smell of their own farts?
"Dude, even that fat ugly chick turned me down. I'm gonna load up on Pintos and Cheese, go home and flatubate in my own king size bed."
by Bugsy McDingle January 10, 2012
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A group of friends get together and target the outcast of the group by diverting his attention then take turns urinating and defecating all over his vehicle. Special attention is paid to glass surfaces, door handles, and fresh air intake. Plausible deniability comes into play when the friend returns to find his car dripping with urine and covered in unintelligible messages written in poo. The group unanimously blames the mess on the neighbors service monkey.
Dude, looks like you just got a Polish Car Wash. Who did you piss off and how you gonna clean that turd out from under the door handle?
by Bugsy McDingle November 21, 2012
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Similar to Safety Beer but for those with more serious drinking problems. It's Saturday night and you haven't made plans yet so you stop by the liquor store and buy a bottle of Glen Parker to get you through any after hours activities. Real men plan ahead and buy a 12 pack of Glen Parker which could eliminate the need to make extra trips to the liquor store for bottles of Scotch on following weekends.
"Anyone getting together for Rock Band or a toga party later tonight? I'll stop by Spec's and pick up a bottle of Glen Parker Safety Scotch just in case."
by Bugsy McDingle November 03, 2011
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Digital penetration of the toilet tissue usually caused by not using enough squares or just generally being a cheap fucker.
Times were tough so as a cost saving measure I only used two squares of toilet tissue per wipe. Next thing I know I'm washing poo off my finger tips. This was not my first TP malfunction.
by Bugsy McDingle November 24, 2012
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Eastern European open air market where amateur porn directors go to find new talent. These aspiring stars are inexperienced and usually unattractive women but are known to give incredible head jobs for just a few Euros and the promise of future parts in mainstream porn. The selection of aspiring porn actresses are often withered drug users and past their sexual prime much like the rotten vegetables found in a Polish farm market.
Hey Baby, I am making a movie and you are so beautiful. Would you like to make some easy money and try out this Polish Salad Bar for the camera back at my hotel?
by Bugsy McDingle November 21, 2012
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Disposal method when one has sharted in a public place or at the home of friends or family. At work it is best to remove shorts, clean ass, and leave shorts on the coat hook in the stall for someone else to find. If visiting friends or family, it is best to be discrete and leave shorts in the bathroom trash can and cover with clean TP and tell no one.
I thought it was just a fart but ended up excusing myself from the dinner table to wipe up and had to do the underpants toss.
by Bugsy McDingle December 02, 2012
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