Definitions by Bonehead

Vert der Ferk

The Swedish Chef coined translation of W.T.F., appropriate for incognito cursing around small children, marionettes, puppets or on television. It’s use is frowned upon in IKEA where Swedish vernacular is commonplace.

IKEA: “we’re ert of der meatballs.”
Me: “Vert der Ferk! You think I’m here for furniture?”
IKEA: “gert ert.”

Vert der Ferk by Bonehead September 7, 2021

Levine 

Someone with plastered with so many random ass tattoos that by all logic they should look trashy, but they’re so chiseled and hot it’s somehow classy.

Man, I’d totally get my right pec inked cherub but idk if I can pull off a Levine

Levine by Bonehead September 7, 2021

Vocabulistics

The study of vocabulary. The one who studies vocabulary is referred to as a vocabulist.

Groot: “I am Groot”
Peter Quill: “wow. That’s just as fascinating as the first 89 times you told me that. What is wrong with Giving Tree here?”
Rocket: “well, he don’t know talking good like me and you, so his vocabulistics is limited to ‘I’ and ‘am’ and ‘Groot,’ specifically in that order.

Vocabulistics by Bonehead September 7, 2021

Yucatán

Peninsula in southeastern Mexico, named after the Mayan phrase meaning “I don’t understand what you’re saying.”

Also known as the Yucatán penisula due to the form resembling a phallus arising from the loins of Mexico.

Cordoba: “Where am I?”
Mayan: “Yucatán.”

Cordoba: “Wow. The Yucatán.”

B.J. “what’s that part of Mexico that looks like a dick?”
Barney: Yucatán. The Yucatán penisula.

Yucatán by Bonehead September 7, 2021

Smellfungus 

A pessimist. Someone with a downright depressing attitude who believes the worst will happen or is already happening.

“Good morning, Pooh Bear. If it is a good morning, which I doubt.” - Eeyore, a classic literary smellfungus

Smellfungus by Bonehead September 3, 2021

Pantyphile 

A person with an underwear fetish. Typically one who has color or texture preferences. Dictates what the other person should wear during intercourse.

Girl 1: I’m talking to this guy who doesn’t like black or red underwear
Girl 2: Ew he sounds like a pantyphile

Pantyphile by Bonehead July 23, 2021

Chitlen 

A small child, often in the stage of language development involving repetition of everything you say.

(pl. chitlens)

Chitlen: *drops ice cream cone* “motherfucker!”

Mom: “Where did you learn to say that?!”
Dad: *meaningful gaze and head shake*
Chitlen: Not from Daddy!

Chitlen by Bonehead July 23, 2021