2 definitions by Autocatfishing

undread

when you get a message from someone you don't want to reply to, but you can't ignore them because they're important or likely ARE conveying something important. You cheekily expand the phone notification so the little symbol doesn't change to "read"

OMG I have got 37 undread messages from my landlord; I swear I'll check them, maybe after I've had time to unwind in the sauna.

by Autocatfishing September 9, 2023

Boomer Bitcoin

A particular weird type of assert that obsesses people of a particular generation. Enthusiasts of this investment evangelically promote it to other people to pump up the value of their portfolio, but it is a risky game for newcomers. The total supply of the asset is fixed. There is no chance that newcomers can buy at the crazy cheap prices of the earlier generation. If you buy in now, you will need to concentrate your savings in highly leveraged and risky investment. But you mention this fact to the enthusiast and they simply continue to boomersplain it to you. Yes, we are talking about *real estate*.

You young people think the crypto crash is new and exciting. But we have been crashing the real estate market for decades. You could say that mortgages are boomer bitcoin.

— My uncle just bought a second holiday house in Thailand and his kids are paying him rent on the family home.
— I know right? He’s going to HODL that boomer bitcoin.
— Yeah bro! And he keeps on trying to get me to invest in these weird mortgages I haven’t even heard of and can’t afford.
— Don’t worry, we’ll get property one day I guess, if we can get to the moon

— Oh man aunt Joanne wants me to invest in a condominium with her.
— Bro! Steer clear of that boomer bitcoin.

by Autocatfishing April 13, 2023