Definitions by Alfetta159
Kindling
Kindling by Alfetta159 August 4, 2011
going all ADD
When some unexpected but not unmanageable event occurs making someone forget all protocol or etiquette regarding the original situation often leading to great inconvenience for those not involved with the new event or situation.
Examples include:
When one enters a restaurant with an acquaintance only to find a baseball game on television and the game becomes the primary focus of one or both persons’ attention.
When someone sees a magazine with an interesting cover photo on a rack in a grocery store and rather than pay for it and read it at home, they grab the magazine with no regard to where their shopping cart is and block the aisle while reading the magazine in the store.
When someone is driving but stopped at a light and sees a friend in another vehicle or on a sidewalk and begins a conversation completely disregarding the traffic signals or that there are other drivers behind him who would like to get on with their lives.
Examples include:
When one enters a restaurant with an acquaintance only to find a baseball game on television and the game becomes the primary focus of one or both persons’ attention.
When someone sees a magazine with an interesting cover photo on a rack in a grocery store and rather than pay for it and read it at home, they grab the magazine with no regard to where their shopping cart is and block the aisle while reading the magazine in the store.
When someone is driving but stopped at a light and sees a friend in another vehicle or on a sidewalk and begins a conversation completely disregarding the traffic signals or that there are other drivers behind him who would like to get on with their lives.
Thing 1: Thanks for suggesting dinner.
Thing 2: Yeah I love the enchiladas here.
Thing 1: Oh, that's right; the Giants are on.
Thing 2: You gonna have a beer?
Thing 1 They took Lincecum out already!?
Waiter: Are you guys ready to order?
Thing 2: Yeah, I’ll have the enchiladas and a big Sierra Nevada.
Thing 1: I bet it’s that problem with the cuticle on the ring-finger of this throwing hand. Did you hear about that?
Thing 2: Ummm, you ready to order?
Waiter: Let me give you guys a few minutes.
Thing 2: So what looks good?
Thing 1: (very loudly in spite of children in the restaurant) Bullshit! It was a strike. Did you see that? See? See? Watch the replay. Are you watching?
Thing 2: DUDE! Stop going all ADD and at least order, and then we'll watch the game.
Thing 2: Yeah I love the enchiladas here.
Thing 1: Oh, that's right; the Giants are on.
Thing 2: You gonna have a beer?
Thing 1 They took Lincecum out already!?
Waiter: Are you guys ready to order?
Thing 2: Yeah, I’ll have the enchiladas and a big Sierra Nevada.
Thing 1: I bet it’s that problem with the cuticle on the ring-finger of this throwing hand. Did you hear about that?
Thing 2: Ummm, you ready to order?
Waiter: Let me give you guys a few minutes.
Thing 2: So what looks good?
Thing 1: (very loudly in spite of children in the restaurant) Bullshit! It was a strike. Did you see that? See? See? Watch the replay. Are you watching?
Thing 2: DUDE! Stop going all ADD and at least order, and then we'll watch the game.
going all ADD by Alfetta159 June 15, 2011
iPhone name
The name of the person asked for by everyone who calls on your new iPhone. The people calling are typically bill collectors, loan sharks, used car dealers, angry relatives or desperate tweakers who are all looking for the loser who had that number before you but couldn’t afford the data plan and all those purchases from iTunes and the App Store that really started to add up after a while.
Just a sec, I've got to take this.
Trevor? No, you've got the wrong number...
Who am I? I'm not Trevor. Who are you? I just got this phone; I don't know any Trevor!
Sorry, apparently my iPhone name is Trevor.
Trevor? No, you've got the wrong number...
Who am I? I'm not Trevor. Who are you? I just got this phone; I don't know any Trevor!
Sorry, apparently my iPhone name is Trevor.
iPhone name by Alfetta159 April 23, 2011
San Francisco St. Bernard
Homeless people who defacate on the street in the middle of the night leaving large piles which must be minded else those new Bruno Maglis or that fresh petticure won't be that new or fresh.
Newbie: I really love this new job, but walking here from the ferry, I surprised how many St. Bernards there are in the city and how few of their owners clean up after them.
Veteran: San Francisco St. Bernards? No, that's just homeless output.
Veteran: San Francisco St. Bernards? No, that's just homeless output.
San Francisco St. Bernard by Alfetta159 December 14, 2010
Dorito effect
The shaking, jerking illusion created by chewing on a crunchy food like corn or tortilla chips while watching an analog (NTSC) television.
That scene with the ferrets and the bounce house was really funny, but I had to back it up and watch it again because I wasn't sure if it was the clip or the Dorito effect.
Dorito effect by Alfetta159 November 7, 2010
Mexican breakfast cereal
When there aren't any whole tortilla chips left and just a bit of salsa left in the bowl, one dumps the remaining chip fragments into the salsa bowl, stirs it up and eats the rest with a spoon.
Mexican breakfast cereal by Alfetta159 October 30, 2010
San Jose intersection
A city street intersection where cars stack up on a red light, while a green light persists in the other direction in spite of the fact that there are no cars travelling through the intersection in that direction.
San Jose intersection by Alfetta159 October 21, 2010