14 definitions by Alfetta159

Three or more landscape technicians who ride in a company pick-up truck at or below the legal speed limit in the fast lane and or usually in the carpool lane on the freeway completely oblivious to the fact that they are holding up traffic or that the carpool lane is not even in effect during that time of day.
Hi, I'm running a little late. I'm on 80, but I'm stuck behind some Mexican gardeners, and I can't even see around their pick-up. Hell, I can't even see thru their windshield. There are three of them packed in together all wearing hats. I guess they don't know that it's not a carpool lanes at lunch. Later.
by Alfetta159 January 22, 2010
When some unexpected but not unmanageable event occurs making someone forget all protocol or etiquette regarding the original situation often leading to great inconvenience for those not involved with the new event or situation.

Examples include:

When one enters a restaurant with an acquaintance only to find a baseball game on television and the game becomes the primary focus of one or both persons’ attention.

When someone sees a magazine with an interesting cover photo on a rack in a grocery store and rather than pay for it and read it at home, they grab the magazine with no regard to where their shopping cart is and block the aisle while reading the magazine in the store.

When someone is driving but stopped at a light and sees a friend in another vehicle or on a sidewalk and begins a conversation completely disregarding the traffic signals or that there are other drivers behind him who would like to get on with their lives.
Thing 1: Thanks for suggesting dinner.

Thing 2: Yeah I love the enchiladas here.

Thing 1: Oh, that's right; the Giants are on.

Thing 2: You gonna have a beer?

Thing 1 They took Lincecum out already!?

Waiter: Are you guys ready to order?

Thing 2: Yeah, I’ll have the enchiladas and a big Sierra Nevada.

Thing 1: I bet it’s that problem with the cuticle on the ring-finger of this throwing hand. Did you hear about that?

Thing 2: Ummm, you ready to order?

Waiter: Let me give you guys a few minutes.

Thing 2: So what looks good?

Thing 1: (very loudly in spite of children in the restaurant) Bullshit! It was a strike. Did you see that? See? See? Watch the replay. Are you watching?

Thing 2: DUDE! Stop going all ADD and at least order, and then we'll watch the game.
by Alfetta159 June 16, 2011
The name of the person asked for by everyone who calls on your new iPhone. The people calling are typically bill collectors, loan sharks, used car dealers, angry relatives or desperate tweakers who are all looking for the loser who had that number before you but couldn’t afford the data plan and all those purchases from iTunes and the App Store that really started to add up after a while.
Just a sec, I've got to take this.

Trevor? No, you've got the wrong number...
Who am I? I'm not Trevor. Who are you? I just got this phone; I don't know any Trevor!

Sorry, apparently my iPhone name is Trevor.
by Alfetta159 April 5, 2011
While driving, the distance from an intersection with a light signal where you decide that regardless of what color the light is, you're not going to stop for that light.

The intersection horizon varies directly with both the speed or size of the vehicle.
Doesn't matter now. We've just passed the intersection horizon.
by Alfetta159 August 13, 2010
A formulaic, boiler-plate television show where the same basic plot or premise occurs each episode but in a different way, (i.e. The crew of the Minnow come up with a plan to get off the uncharted, desert isle, but Gilligan screws it all up.). Notorious examples are how-to shows where some contractor or contracting group comes to a house, shows a plan, does the work, and then, “Oh… my… God,” shows the owner the result. Other examples are Eureka, American Chopper, Curb Appeal, and Save My Bath.
You know, that reminds me of that one American Chopper?

Which one?

The one where they decide to create a really cool, one-off motorcycle, but they make sure not to give themselves enough time before they plan on showing it, so the dad and son keep getting into arguments, Vince does all the work, but somehow they manage to get the chopper finished in time for the show. And Mikey is just weird.

Oh, well that narrows it down a lot. That is a real Gilligan's Island show.
by Alfetta159 September 13, 2010
A city street intersection where cars stack up on a red light, while a green light persists in the other direction in spite of the fact that there are no cars travelling through the intersection in that direction.
Sure, I'm stopped at a San Jose intersection, so I've got plenty of time.
by Alfetta159 October 20, 2010
When there aren't any whole tortilla chips left and just a bit of salsa left in the bowl, one dumps the remaining chip fragments into the salsa bowl, stirs it up and eats the rest with a spoon.
Pass me the chips..." "There aren't many left. It looks like Mexican breakfast cereal time.
by Alfetta159 October 30, 2010